Lady Gaga Totally Looks Like a Splicer

November 24, 2009 by 29 Comments

Lady Gaga totally looks like a Splicer from BioShock
Lady Gaga totally looks like a Splicer from BioShock

So I saw this picture on TotallyLooksLike.com that compares Lady Gaga to a Splicer from BioShock and it made me laugh so I wanted to post it except the picture was so fucking small you needed a magnifying glass to be able to tell you weren’t actually looking at the Easter Bunny so initially I was simply going to enlarge it except then I was all like, “What the fuck is up with those black bars on the Splicer picture” so I decided to just remake the entire thing myself so I started searching for Lady Gaga pictures and got distracted for about an hour because half of them showed a penis and you guys know how much I enjoy those but I finally remembered what I was supposed to be doing so I got off my ass and repieced the image and went to duplicate the text except I realized they used a lowercase “S” in BioShock because they’re the world’s biggest n00bs or something so I went to fix that except I chose a font that only uses capital letters so you can’t even tell that I know the “S” in BioShock is supposed to be capitalized so now I look like an ass for even bringing it up, not that I don’t usually look like an ass mind you. Gawd, I’m so fucking bored. Is it Thanksgiving yet?

PS: In case it wasn’t clear, credit for the picture goes solely to TotallyLooksLike.com. And if you didn’t already pick that up, you should probably learn how to read. Seriously.

Filed under Perky PlayStation, Video Games, Xtreme Xbox

IH3SotW: Every Guy’s Dream

November 24, 2009 by 14 Comments

IH3SotW (short for Inappropriate Halo 3 Screenshot of the Week) places heavy emphasis on the inappropriate. While each featured screenshot will be delightfully distasteful, some may be more subtle than others. I won’t bother explaining them since figuring it out for yourself will be half the fun. Every one taken from my personal Halo pr0n collection, I hope you enjoy them as much as I do!

Halo 3 Screenshot
Author: RsU Frost

Filed under Halo Heaven, Video Games, Xtreme Xbox Tagged with ,

Perfect for Covenant Friday

November 24, 2009 by 23 Comments

I would let pretty much any creature with four mandibles in my pants. Fellow Halo fanatic Blueskyfish feels the same way except she makes one important distinction: she only allows them on her pants. Feeling the need to publicly display her love for all things Sangheili, one afternoon she grabbed a felt tip clothing marker and proceeded to draw a sword-wielding Elite directly upon the upper right thigh of her favorite pair of blue jeans. In case you were planning on formally requesting the addition of Halo-themed graphics on her back pockets so you could freely stare at that region as well, don’t bother. I’m way ahead of you on that one.

Halo Jeans

*Image posted with permission.

Filed under Crafty Crap, Halo Heaven, Video Games, Xtreme Xbox Tagged with ,

This BioShock Cosplay Is Sure to Make You Wet

November 23, 2009 by 23 Comments

Harrison Krix, the mastermind and creator behind the incredible Portal gun and the equally amazing Fallout 3 AER9 laser rifle, has returned to his BioShock roots by constructing a Big Daddy cosplay. Upon its completion he grabbed his girlfriend, the ADAM extracting syringe he had previously made her, and set forth for the nearest aquarium for a Rapture-themed photoshoot. To say the images turned out beautiful would be the understatement of the century. To say they’re fucking bad ass would be a bit more accurate.

BioShock Cosplay

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Filed under Perky PlayStation, Video Games, Xtreme Xbox

The Katonian Press: Valve Announces Thanksgiving DLC Just in Time for the Holidays

November 23, 2009 by 15 Comments

The Katonian Press, a regular offering brought to you by the evil genius and criminal mastermind behind the always scintillating WITFITS, will soon be your best source for weekly fake gaming news, assuming it’s not already. Grab a cup of coffee, open up The Katonian Press, and enjoy it for what it is: a satirical look at various things gaming-related.

Valve Announces Thanksgiving DLC Just in Time for the Holidays

TurkeyBellevue, WA – Just a week after the release of their zombie-survival sequel, Left 4 Dead 2, Valve Software has announced the first in what no doubt will be a series of themed Downloadable Content (DLC) packs for the game. The Thanksgiving Pack bridges the original title and its sequel by having all eight survivors meet to celebrate the holiday and give thanks that they survived the zombie apocalypse. The campaign, entitled “Pass The Stuffing”, starts the players among the zombie-infested floats of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and follows them as they fight through hordes of the infected, hoping to make it to the safe house in time for supper. Press release follows:

Bill, Louis, Francis, Zoey, Coach, Ellis, Nick, and Rochelle have waded through wave after wave of zombie hordes, fighting for their very survival in a world where a massive outbreak has doomed most of the population. Having been rescued close to a dozen times, the plucky band of survivors finally get a well-deserved respite, just in time for Thanksgiving! They decided to get together and celebrate their good fortune, but wait, whose turn was it to buy the turkey? The survivors are dropped right in the middle of a zombie-run Macy’s Parade and once again have to fight for lives–watch out for the giant Zombie Snoopy float!–in the hopes of making their way to a grocery store that’s still open, not overrun by zombies, and stocked with enough turkey, stuffing mix, and cranberry sauce to satisfy Coach! And then, when it seems like they’ve finally made it to the safe house to enjoy their meal, they have to work out how they are going to fit everyone around the table (no one wants to sit next to the Boomer) and who gets stuck at the kiddie table with The Witch.

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Filed under Video Games, Xtreme Xbox Tagged with

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