I missed my regular Halo sessions last weekend so today finds me suffering from serious withdrawal symptoms. Thankfully the current Double EXP playlist of choice, the always enjoyable Grifball, is one of my favorites meaning I can look forward to two solid days of alternating between pounding and getting pounded. Before I go off in search of my hammer, let’s recap last week’s rather witty responses and then we can caption yet another Halo 3 screenshot!
- “Try as she might, Dare just couldn’t move her head from the Velcro wall.” (Jussy)
- “In the place of a Dark Lord you would have a Queen! Not dark but beautiful and terrible as the Morn!” (Pete Cooper)
- “Does this angle make my jaw look any smaller?” (JLay)
- “Stay perfectly still… their vision is based on movement.” (Das Kalk)
- “Your rollover minutes are perfectly good! Not everyone gets to keep their unused minutes, you know.” (A Deaf Boy)
- “Everything was going so well, until Dare spotted Gaius Baltar in the Data Hive ….” (Iago 462)
- “Dare thought the mood lighting did wonders for her face. The Rookie, on the other hand, did not.” (Absolute Edge)
- “Dare’s face when she realised what the strange and unfamiliar octopus-like alien was really attempting to do.” (Crazeye0)
Mmmmmmm … tentacles. Is it getting hot in here or is it just me? While I battle the increasing amount of perspiration beads suddenly adorning my forehead, how about you stay busy by taking a gander at our newest ODST-themed screenshot? You can even come up with a funny caption to go along with it if you so desire. I don’t mind one bit, promise!
Author: o DomDaBomb o
Posted by bs angel on November 6, 2009 at 2:20 am
FIRST!
Hey, it’s Round 69. Who else did you think would be first in line?
Posted by mendicantbias00 on November 6, 2009 at 2:16 pm
How are there not 69 thumbs up yet?!?!
Posted by Sean C84 on November 6, 2009 at 2:31 pm
I assure you, the internet is working on it.
Posted by Pete Cooper on November 6, 2009 at 2:37 am
“GET YOUR OWN TAUNTAUN!”
Posted by ALTEX on November 6, 2009 at 9:29 am
my god man, people like you are the reason they took the dinosaurs out of halo 1, way to ruin it for the rest of us.
Posted by Arby on November 6, 2009 at 2:40 am
The Warthog, Zebras’ most deadliest predator.
Posted by cardo on November 6, 2009 at 3:10 am
Is this zebra related to Dare? Just look at the size of its jaw!!
Posted by cardo on November 6, 2009 at 3:12 am
Dude, PETA is going to have your ass…
Posted by Jillybean on November 6, 2009 at 3:44 am
Ze horse! She is dead!
Posted by AvalonTreman on November 6, 2009 at 3:50 am
Well, New Mombasa IS in Africa…
Posted by IcyTreats on November 6, 2009 at 3:51 am
“I’ve gotta try an’ patch up the zebra, we hit it hard.”
“You know, Dutch, getting the Warthog’s wheel of it’s side might do it some good.”
Posted by Sierra-777 on November 6, 2009 at 10:47 am
WIN.
The tire looks like it actually is on the zebra’s side XD
Posted by Arby on November 6, 2009 at 5:10 pm
=O Really?!
Posted by IcyTreats on November 9, 2009 at 4:35 am
O.O
I know I’m funny, but there are alot more better ones….. :(
Posted by Arby on November 12, 2009 at 11:26 pm
I wasn’t referring to you Icy, I was referring to Sierra-777 ;)
Posted by EliteXDeath on November 6, 2009 at 4:06 am
“We have an animal down! Get a medic!… Vet!… Or whatever we need to get this zebra back in action.”
Posted by MrCrazy on November 6, 2009 at 4:30 am
“Call base, its barbeque time!!!”
Posted by mendicantbias00 on November 6, 2009 at 5:11 am
Dude…NO ONE is going to believe that you thought it was a Brute.
Posted by nixproto (Drake) on November 6, 2009 at 5:15 am
“It’s all fun and games until you hit a zebra.”
OR
“This is what happens when you buy the Halo upgrade for Zoo Tycoon. Poor, poor zebra.”
Posted by Das Kalk on November 6, 2009 at 5:38 am
“Alright calm down, calm down, this isn’t as bad as it looks. We’d better plant a pistol on him to be sure… I know how these things go down”
——————–
“alright, we’ll just stick the needle in here for his vaccinations and- uh oh…”
“what? what is it?”
“I do believe I’ve killed him”
——————–
“you may have killed him when you ran him over thirty times, you may have killed him when you tea-bagged him. I don’t know, I’m not a doctor”
——————–
“EEWWWWWW i don’t want to cut him open just to stay warm!”
*squish*
“you know it’s not so bad once you Feng Shui the organs.”
——————–
Posted by CrazedOne1988 on November 6, 2009 at 10:35 am
way to use family guy quotes there kalk
Posted by Das Kalk on November 6, 2009 at 9:48 pm
only 3 out of 4 crazed. way to tell everyone -_-
Posted by StealthSpeed3 on November 6, 2009 at 5:38 am
Damn World of WarCraft crossovers!!
____
After installing the Zebra-Catcher on the front of the Warthog, the Rookie was eager to try it out.
Posted by pwkwsfi on November 6, 2009 at 5:48 pm
yeah, if it had a horn, it would be a zhevra. wait, the warthog has a horn. no problem!
Posted by A Deaf Boy on November 6, 2009 at 6:15 am
“You’re right. There’s no trace of lilac berries. That’s so weird, though. She shows all the classic signs of Meliatoxicity…”
Posted by Cleansing Aura on November 6, 2009 at 6:15 am
- Oh my God, Oh my God. ONI is gonna have our asses for this! WE’RE SCREWED. DAMMIT.
-Just calm down. Look. It was dead when we found it right? RIGHT?
-Sure, ok. Whatever. Now lets get out of here!
-Slow down – first we need to get rid of the ride, the booze and the weed.
-How are we gonna do that?
-Let’s go say high to the brutes…
Posted by The Last Hunter on November 6, 2009 at 6:30 am
The ODST’s were stunned when they saw that the warthog came riding on the zebra
Posted by Queen 0f Blades (Sonya 00101) on November 6, 2009 at 7:19 am
What’s black and white and red all over? Roadkill.
Posted by SkelBrute on November 6, 2009 at 7:22 am
“Hoo boy, this new pistol’s got some kinda range on it, don’t it Bubba? And its got good knockdown power, too! Wait til Leroy and Donnie Ray hear that I shot this here zebra all the way from them cranes back yonder with this little thing! You get all this on film? Ya think we’ll get our own hunting show for this? Come on man, let’s get him in the truck!! “
Posted by Yami on November 6, 2009 at 7:49 am
“… ho’kay.. Now we got nuclear winter and everyones dead… except Africa.. And their gonna be dead soon… Damn -scibbled over word- zebras”
Posted by shadowsquid86 on November 6, 2009 at 7:51 am
10 seconds later, they proceeded to teabag the corpse.
Posted by InventiveArgument on November 6, 2009 at 7:55 am
Food chain of Halo: Warthog-Zebra-Odst
“The ODST’s laughed at my name for the new vehicle, well, when this baby drops from 1000 feet right onto there warthog, who’ll be laughing then?”
Although quick and equipped with camouflage the new covie Z.E.- B.R.A vehicle failed to inspire fear into their enemies
Posted by Mizzy on November 6, 2009 at 8:50 am
“YELLLLEEEERRRRR!” ;_;
Posted by Mizzy on November 6, 2009 at 8:07 pm
Wow, is everyone too young to even get that ref?
Posted by Poopie McGhee on November 6, 2009 at 8:20 pm
I got it…
Posted by BerserkerBarage on November 6, 2009 at 9:04 am
When a daddy Warthog and a momma Zebra love each other very much…
~B.B.
Posted by Monkey_lord on November 6, 2009 at 9:13 am
When Dutch saw that the Rookie has a golden zebra, he tried to catch one on his own.
Hey dude, when I said fire the tranquilizer; I did not mean to use the chain gun.
Posted by Monkey_lord on November 8, 2009 at 4:53 pm
Here we see a screen shot of a remake of Jurassic Park with a Halo cross over. Continuation of the movie was questioned as the title “New Mombasa Uplift Reserve in the middle of a covenant invasion with a bunch of ODST’s” was a bit long among other things.
Posted by mendicantbias00 on November 6, 2009 at 9:20 am
And THAT is why you don’t use a zebra in a donkey show!
Posted by Mr Viper on November 6, 2009 at 9:38 am
“I swear it just jumped right out infront of me!”
“But we were PARKED”
Posted by BC on November 6, 2009 at 9:51 am
“And they say they smell bad on the outside…”
Posted by rowboat 000 on November 6, 2009 at 10:01 am
Puma – 1
Zebra – 0
Posted by JLay on November 6, 2009 at 10:26 am
Acheivement Unlocked – Earned Your Stripes
Get a splatter kill on a zebra in multiplayer campaign.
Posted by Skeah on November 6, 2009 at 10:30 am
SHUT UP WARTHOG, GET ON MY HORSE.
(http://shutupwomangetonmyhorse.com/) >_>
*shrugs*
Posted by Sarge Tomzilla on November 6, 2009 at 10:37 am
“Alright Rookie, just follow my lead on this and don’t say anything. It came out of nowhere and charged us, we had no other choice but to gun it down. Got that?”
Posted by Silen7 Sam Strikes Back on November 6, 2009 at 10:43 am
Its better then Swine Flu…
Posted by Owl Assassin on November 6, 2009 at 10:45 am
And we, we are the zebras!
Wait, that’s wrong…
Posted by L337MA573R on November 6, 2009 at 10:51 am
+ “It’s getting closer!” “No it’s not! If it was, it would be getting bigger!” “It is getting bigger! Look at it!” “I am looking at it!” BOOM! “Yep, you’re right.”
+ “Grab a plasma pistol, we can make this work.”
+ “Ummm…….oops?”
+ “Dibs!”
+ “Thank god Peta’s HQ got blown up.”
+ “Is god giving me lemons? Because I can’t find any sugar in this situation to make lemonade out of.”
Posted by Mike on November 6, 2009 at 10:57 am
i hear this is how swine flu started… youve doomed us all!
Posted by halcylon on November 6, 2009 at 11:41 am
You saw it, right? It jumped out in front of me. I couldn’t do anything… You saw, that’s what you saw right?
Dude… we’re in a zoo… You’re fucked.
Posted by Tactful on November 6, 2009 at 12:01 pm
It don’t matter if you’re black or white; It only matters if you’re both.
—–
The alternative ending to Racing Stripes was quickly vetoed by test audiences.
—–
When jokingly Buck asked “What’s black, white and red all over?” the Rookie swiftly answered.
—–
Fans of the series were surprised to hear that Halo: Reach was actually a crossover between the Halo universe and Dreamwork’s Madagascar.
—–
The Rookie gained his miltary stripes the hard way.
—–
Planting the Magnum on the body was easy; The hard part was making it look like suicide…
—–
The ODST’s mission became personal when the Covenant began recruiting begrudged earth species to fill out their ranks.
—–
Rookie wasn’t sure which he regretted more; Killing a member of an endangered species, or wasting that last Spartan Laser shot.
—–
Dropping to one knee and yelling a ‘Big No’ into the heavens, Buck mourned the untimely passing of Dare.
Posted by JLay on November 6, 2009 at 1:22 pm
WIN on the “making it look like a suicide” one!
Posted by General Vagueness on November 6, 2009 at 12:02 pm
Having finally beat the dead horse until it disintegrated, Halo speculators moved on to a dead zebra.
______________________________________________________________________________
“What, you dared me to kill it.” “No, I said Dare told us not to kill them.”
______________________________________________________________________________
“He’s dead, Jim.”
Posted by Queen 0f Blades (Sonya 00101) on November 7, 2009 at 9:27 am
Thumbs up for the “He’s dead, Jim.” :D
Posted by Tactful on November 6, 2009 at 12:06 pm
After extensive research on the history of Human-Human Conflict, the Covenant came up with their own version of the Trojan Horse. Coincedently you can fit a surprising amount of Suicide Grunts in a drained carcass.
Posted by Zerowind117 on November 6, 2009 at 12:17 pm
“Are you honestly going to try and tell me that you thought that zebra was a ’serious security breech’? I’d believe it was turned into a weapon agianst its will by the Covanent, but not that it was a spy man.”
Posted by Sean Bradley on November 6, 2009 at 12:20 pm
The UNSC Zebra didn’t prove to be nearly as dependable on the battlefield as other animal themed vehicles.
Posted by Speedhuntr on November 6, 2009 at 12:22 pm
“Ohhh sh*t!”
“Mufasa is going to be PISSED.”
Posted by SonofMacPhisto on November 6, 2009 at 12:31 pm
‘You didn’t see it? Really Dutch? I’m sorry, I didn’t think you really were color blind.’
Posted by SonofMacPhisto on November 6, 2009 at 12:33 pm
After finishing up the horse, HBO moved on to the dead zebra.
Posted by QuackJAG on November 6, 2009 at 12:35 pm
*Cue Titanic music.* “Goodnight. Sweet prince. As flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.”
Posted by Leafman on November 6, 2009 at 12:36 pm
“Tie it to the roof, looks like we going to be having Zebra cakes for awhile.”
Posted by AusQB on November 6, 2009 at 12:42 pm
“Hmm, they must’ve recycled them from Far Cry 2.”
Posted by SIR COFFEE on November 6, 2009 at 1:05 pm
One ODST to the other: Is it just me, or is that zebra far larger than it should be?
Posted by Gunlat3M on November 6, 2009 at 1:30 pm
The ODST’s Command Officer buckled down.”Exactly how am I supposed to report this?! You want New Mombasans up my ass about their tax dollars being spent by joyrides and roadkill?”
Posted by Dust and Echoes on November 6, 2009 at 1:39 pm
“We both agree that if anyone asks, the covenant killed him.”
“Yeah. Now let’s get the car out of here. It was ‘damaged in combat’”
Posted by jVictor on November 6, 2009 at 1:47 pm
“Everything’s bigger in Mombasa. Everything.”
Posted by MasterCheifn on November 6, 2009 at 2:23 pm
“He’s dead, Jim.”
Posted by Sc4r on November 6, 2009 at 2:47 pm
“What am I gonna tell chelsea?”
“She doesn’t need to know”
Posted by borrowedchief on November 6, 2009 at 2:54 pm
I swear it was like that when I got here.
Posted by Personsen on November 6, 2009 at 2:56 pm
“Dad’s going to be so pissed!”
Posted by Poopie McGhee on November 6, 2009 at 3:06 pm
“You’re gonna have to put it out of it’s misery”
Posted by Surrender on November 6, 2009 at 3:09 pm
TANTRUM!
Posted by Elnea on November 6, 2009 at 3:35 pm
“I’m taking him home and nursing him back to health. I’ll love him, and hug him, and call him George. Or maybe Mister Stripey.”
Posted by Wasiq on November 6, 2009 at 4:00 pm
“Just hold on Swiftyshift, I just need to skin 15 more Zhevras until I get to buy the Expert Skinning Training.”
Posted by Gnome on November 6, 2009 at 4:13 pm
“Several ODST’s decide to celebrate the 69th Friday Caption fun, but unfortunately they couldn’t afford entertainment. They decided that the zebra would have to do.”
“Two ODST’s try to reennact the Tauntan scene in starwars.”
Posted by Tree12324 on November 6, 2009 at 4:16 pm
:’(
Posted by undercoverduck on November 6, 2009 at 4:22 pm
OM NOM NOM NOM NOM!
Posted by Nelmo Nelmz on November 6, 2009 at 4:23 pm
I know just the right tune, to put this zebra, back on his feet…
Posted by The Flying Spartan on November 6, 2009 at 4:32 pm
“Aw, damn it, they took the free refill coupon!”
Posted by Don113 on November 6, 2009 at 4:38 pm
“So…..you gonna eat that?”
Posted by Ebon Blade on November 6, 2009 at 4:42 pm
“People who’ve ever said that something ‘was as much fun as going to the zoo and seeing all the animals dead’ totally did not know what they were talking about.”
Posted by NickBeam on November 6, 2009 at 4:45 pm
holy crap ! omg omg man is it breathing ? wtf wtf ! DUDE GET THE CAR OFF IT ALREADY !
Posted by petetheduck on November 6, 2009 at 4:50 pm
“Great, now we’re going to have to have our Warthog put to sleep”
Early in Foe Hammer’s career, she wasn’t always as skillful in delivering Warthogs to the front line
Posted by StephaBon on November 6, 2009 at 5:30 pm
No one would have guessed, but Warthogs kill Zebras in the wild.
Posted by UnluckyIrish14 on November 6, 2009 at 5:30 pm
This is when they realized they needed to put “Zebra Crossing” signs all over New Mombasa.
Posted by Basic Paul on November 6, 2009 at 5:51 pm
Why is this zebra so damn big.
Posted by pwkwsfi on November 6, 2009 at 5:52 pm
“I still can’t tell: white with black stripes, or black with white stripes?”
Posted by Fushiko on November 6, 2009 at 5:53 pm
Dutch was just kidding when he threw out the idea of crossing a warthog with a zebra, but rookie took it one step further…
Posted by xLAS3RP01NT3Rx on November 6, 2009 at 6:03 pm
I’m gonna take it home and stuff it, Mommy!
Posted by ablestmage on November 6, 2009 at 9:00 pm
What do you mean you think it was Voldem.. that’s unicorns, idiot! UNICORNS!
Posted by Zee-V70 on November 6, 2009 at 9:18 pm
“That Zebra said it would be killed when pigs fly!”
“Well, it looks like…
the Warthog ramped.”
YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH
Posted by Das Kalk on November 6, 2009 at 9:53 pm
“Buck and Dutch’s drive HOME from Vegas was much more eventful than their time IN Vegas”
———————–
“Oh man, Brussels is gonna be pissed”
How’s that Crazed?
Posted by Ny Hitman 0401 on November 6, 2009 at 10:05 pm
“Oh Shit… Leroy… We hit it…”
or….
“Mom… this is why I drive…”
Posted by Gnome on November 6, 2009 at 11:59 pm
“While rehearsing for a show they were going to put on in mexico, they suddenly raelized that there is no such thing as a black and white striped donkey.”
“The news once reported that a man was sexed to death by a horse (I kid you not), today that man’s brother gets his revenge.”
Posted by Jagged-117 on November 7, 2009 at 1:53 am
-”White meat or dark meat?”
-”Both!”
Posted by Xenokyro on November 7, 2009 at 5:10 am
“After this tragic encounter, Dutch gained an everlasting phobia of safaris.”
__________
“Dutch and the Rookie really outdid themselves on this year’s annual Pinata Party.”
Posted by wrinklycat on November 7, 2009 at 7:44 am
It would seem in your anger…. you ran her over
Posted by porge on November 7, 2009 at 8:32 am
and I thought they smelled bad on the outside
Posted by DethPwn has pneumonia! on November 7, 2009 at 9:19 am
The demos for Africa were… bug-infested, to say the least
Posted by Touya on November 7, 2009 at 10:30 am
“You know private, when you said ‘I’d hit that,’ at first I thought you were one of those weird furry people…now you’re just sadistic”
Posted by Tactful on November 7, 2009 at 11:36 am
Yo Zebra, I’m happy for you, and imma let you finish, but Mufasa had one of the most dramatic animal deaths of all time!
Posted by Whitehawk13 on November 7, 2009 at 1:01 pm
Dr. Cox: You hear hooves, you just go ahead and think horsey, m’kay?
__________________________
ODST 1: Please tell me this isn’t the ‘prototype transport’ the General was on about…
Posted by Will Pwn 4 Food on November 7, 2009 at 2:27 pm
Ever wonder why zebras are endangered? Now you know.
Posted by DTA MoonDawg on November 7, 2009 at 3:50 pm
“Even 500 years in the future, poaching is still a serious threat to the animals of New Mombasa.”
“Ew, we got zebra bits in the gril!”
Posted by DTA MoonDawg on November 7, 2009 at 3:51 pm
grill*
Damn “L” key is sticky….for reasons completely unrelated…
Posted by The Splatterer on November 7, 2009 at 4:17 pm
“OMG OMG OMG! this is bad this is really really bad!” “I know, oh my gosh i can’t believe it!” “this is so bad just look at the dent in the warthog dad is gunna kill us!”
Posted by L3377MA573R on November 7, 2009 at 5:46 pm
I’m sorry, but me and friend couldn’t resist the urge to one-up this guy.
http://www.bungie.net/Online/Halo3UserContentDetails.aspx?h3fileid=100400750
Posted by IcyTreats on November 7, 2009 at 9:56 pm
“The grill ate the zebra’s face! Noooooo!”
Posted by Absolute Edge on November 7, 2009 at 8:57 pm
Nope, this one doesn’t have any candy either. I’m beginning to think Romeo was lying to us…
Posted by Mikey Rocks on November 8, 2009 at 11:39 am
Its fine its fine don’t freak out, just sprinkle some crack on him and lets get out of here.
Posted by CapturetheBomb on November 8, 2009 at 11:43 am
“Hog beats EVERYTHING!!!”
“Lets plant a gun on him. I know how these things go down.”
Posted by CapturetheBomb on November 8, 2009 at 11:46 am
Forgot one.
“I’m telling ya dude, it is white with black stripes, not black with white stripes.”
Posted by CapturetheBomb on November 8, 2009 at 11:59 am
Okay, last one.
“I told you already. I thought it was the Brute’s mount. It rejected my hijack, so I had to destroy it so it couldn’t be used by those gorillas. They are both from Africa right?”
Posted by KkilljoyGruntT on November 9, 2009 at 1:43 am
Oh trust me, they ‘go down’ quite nicely!
Posted by Morpheus300 on November 8, 2009 at 2:18 pm
An Excellent Diagnosis, What ave it away, The blood next to it or the Worthog on top of it
(P.S BS Angel, I have tried so many times, please tell me if this is good)
Posted by Desert Rat on November 8, 2009 at 4:17 pm
So, the Warthog IS the devil!
Posted by Woody on November 8, 2009 at 5:59 pm
…We’re gonna need a bigger freezer.
Posted by KkilljoyGruntT on November 9, 2009 at 1:43 am
So, if we both do it, is it gay bestiality?
White meat or dark?
Zebra, the other white meat.
Roadkill! 29 points!
Crap! We gotta hide this before hte rangers get here.
Damn jaywalkers!
Better call triple A.
Posted by the blue shoe on November 9, 2009 at 4:26 am
“Do you eat dark meat?”
Posted by pwkwsfi on November 9, 2009 at 11:06 pm
trying to caption a screenshot after Friday is like beating a dead zebra.
Posted by Babbott on November 10, 2009 at 3:03 pm
Someone ran over Frankie Munez’s Voice over animal
Posted by The Real Dr Nog on November 10, 2009 at 5:22 pm
Sir, i think we have a problem, we hit a deer
Bout time, UNSC never gives us lunch
oh no did we hit it
by god, these covenant are becoming more gruesome than i had imagined,… thats a zebra,… oh
Overly Deadly Safari Troopers
Posted by Ghandis Friend on November 10, 2009 at 7:48 pm
Dude I swear I thought it was a hallucination from that LSD we took a couple seconds ago
Posted by Cardo on November 11, 2009 at 5:19 pm
Ohhh, let’s cut off its head and put it in Truth’s bed. Godfather stylee…
Posted by RC on November 12, 2009 at 12:07 am
It was comin’ right for us!
Posted by LO0 on November 13, 2009 at 6:02 am
“We could’ve saved a ton of money on our car insurance if you hadn’t run over that gekko back there! Now what?!”
Posted by Gunlat3M on November 14, 2009 at 10:54 pm
It’s late, but I just thought of one.
“Uplift Reserve, huh? We could use a lift to get this damned Warthog off the Zebra.”