Top Ten Halo 3: ODST Pick-Up Lines
October 8, 2009 78 Comments
It’s a well established fact that some people use Xbox Live as a dating service, focusing more on the potential real life score instead of the better chanced virtual game-related one. Unfortunately their verbal attempts are frequently recycled where you’ve heard them all before so I decided to draft some original Halo 3: ODST-themed pick-up lines to assist in attempts at scoring a Halo-obsessed girlfriend. These quirky quips will increase your chances tenfold! Or cause her to immediately disconnect. Definitely one or the other though.
If there were real life achievements, simply looking at you would unlock the Stunning! one.
Women loved to be given complements, even when it’s just the standard ones, but drop a word like stunning and they’re guaranteed to melt right before your eyes. Whether it’s from the impending laser or your words though, that will be left for you to decipher.
I know I’m not supposed to shoot anything pink, but yours looks a little too good to resist.
If you play this one right, you may not only have a shot at the pink but perhaps she’ll even grant you access to the stink. Or didn’t you know where the “Shock” in ODST originated from?
You know how the Rookie went down for Dare? Let’s just say I would gladly do the same for you.
The Rookie had to travel all the way to sub-level nine to find Dare. Luckily you don’t have to go down nearly that far. Plus, the conditions aren’t quite as hostile. Hopefully anyways.
Sure the campaign is short, but that just leaves you more time to play with my Johnson.
You knew that pre-order bonus would come in handy somehow. You just didn’t know it would be this good!
Is there an Optican station nearby because the second I approached you, I instantly felt better.
If you want to go above and beyond, take a clue from the first aid stations in the game and be ready with an emollient of sorts. And yes, flavored lubricant totally counts.
I still need the My Clothes! achievement. Any chance you could take off my pants and I could finish you with a headshot?
Brutes aren’t the only ones who enjoy getting their pants taken off. Plus, if she’s any good, she’ll drain you better than any plasma pistol ever could.
*eyeing the breastplate* I never cared much for dual wielding anyways. I’ve always preferred to handle those suckers one at a time.
Sure they come in pairs but each one deserves individual attention. You’ll know you’re doing it right when it’s her that needs the silencer, not the pistol.
If you thought getting the Vidmaster Endure achievement was impressive, you should see how many rounds I can go in the bedroom. Let’s just say you’ll be calling in reinforcements long before the night is over.
Make sure you introduce yourself to any and all of her friends before using this line. I certainly can’t think of a better lineup of reinforcements, can you?
You must be part Hunter because the second I laid eyes on you, I wanted to do you from behind.
There’s a special spot in the back you should always aim for on Hunters. She has a similar area. You’ll recognize it when you see it!
I don’t need a beacon because I already know my ultimate destination. And that’s right here with you.
Aaawww, so disgustingly sweet. Who the hell falls for lines like that anyways?