The Truth About Teabagging

teabagging graph bars ftw
created by GeneralCupcakes

graph-related stories

123 Responses to The Truth About Teabagging

  1. Rayquaza says:

    XD isn’t far wrong

    • FDS Omega 808 says:

      wow, I always get teabagged in the face+bash.

      • hoseph says:

        lag causes most of the missed teabaging. what u see on your screen isnt what they see most of the time

    • T-bagginNinja says:

      Without tea baggin there would be no other spartans to tea bag other spartan. THERE WOULD BE NO HALO!!!!
      Go for the butt, put up with the chlamidia.

  2. Someone says:

    I would of thought most people do it more on the legs

  3. soulofaqua says:

    The truth about teabagging; variation is essential >.>

    • bs angel says:

      Variety is the spice of life ya know!

    • I3rett says:

      teabagging is for BK scrubs, it is for nubs

  4. LOL :) So true!

  5. Ragingterror says:

    Hm… this graph seems to be lacking a slice for “Codpiece”.

    • GeneralCupcakes says:

      Ah Shoot! I forgot it’s a hotspot!

      • The Nuclear Man says:

        Correction: Variety is the spice of Death

        • FakeFurball says:

          Whoo! GoW 2 reference!

    • gordon says:

      its in there but its hard to see

  6. LAZR Blade 14 says:

    It’s because of the body landing in a different location for each Xbox.
    Say, yesterday. My best friend and I were messing around on Epitaph, we got exploded. On mine, the only contact our corpses made were my hand was on her arm. But on her Xbox, her face was on my body’s codpiece.

    • Snico says:

      that is very true

      • BUNNYEVIL says:

        I does It to the face.

    • lief12502 says:

      actually this applies to every body (note: the spacebar was intended) even live ones. try driving past some one in a chopper (slightely to your right of them) it will still splatter

      • Vaati says:

        This is very true, and doesn’t just apply to dead/alive bodies. once my friend & I were making a map on sandbox, and though I made a perfectly level ceiling, he kept complaining it was uneven & had gaps & so on. Then he said that one wall I placed didn’t touch the crypt’s wall, and proceeded to walk through a gap that didn’t exist on my screen!!!! No, neither of us hack/mod, and there wasn’t THAT much lag, just enough so that our two xboxes disagreed on the placement of the items.

        Then, after I left, I must have been host, ’cause he got a black screen for a moment, then I heard him say “Whoa! What the ****?!? The ceiling is perfectly flat now, and the walls are perfectly straight, and the gap I was walking through disappeared! WTF!!!”

  7. Captain Spark says:

    What few times I have ever teabagged anyone, I always teabag the face. If the body is face down, I melee it until it is face up if I have time to do so. No sense bagging the legs, always go for the face. If you are going to teabag, always make it as humiliating as possible especially if that player teabagged you previously :)

    I also find it very satisfying to take out an enemy player in the act of teabagging a team mate.

    • DethPwn says:

      I totally agree. Do it right or not at all!

      • tehbagboy says:

        i only teabag when i teamkill cuz it is rly rly funny

        • Guitarfreak2008 says:

          the only thing about teabagging your teamate after killing them. It’s really senseless and is a move that most douchebags would do. if you are going to teamkill then get out of the game becasue there is no sense in that crap. you don’t play a game to piss someone off you play to either win or have fun without pissing people off,

    • Proute says:

      If facing downward, teabag the butt.

      • CyberClaw says:

        I think that would be necrophilia?

    • KNITEpanda says:

      No, if you guys read the statement above this one. To you it looks like you are teabagging their actual corpse. However to other players on your team and the other team alike, you may be on their legs barely hitting it, or no where near their body at all. Thats how it works, hence the Pie Chart supplied above.

    • That guy says:

      Agreed! Go for the head! Feet, legs, chest, they all fail just as hard as you do if you tea bag any of those other body parts thats not the head!!! Just make sure you dont tea bag in between there legs o_o

    • US MaYHeM says:

      true dat, i only tea-bag if tha dudes p*&!in me off, i kill him, start baggin his face

  8. Tentimook says:

    What about the arse?

    • idon'tknow says:

      In America it’s just an ass….but i do agree….what’s wrong tea bagging the ass?

      • matt says:

        Actually in America it’s still “arse” – “ass” in every country means donkey, but people use it anyway.
        Sorry for the grammar nazism, back on topic…

        If you’re teabagging there, that would count as necrophilia! That’s a Neddy-no-no!

        • matt says:

          (by “every country” I meant every English-speaking country)

  9. puptastrophe says:

    ROFL. That’s great. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve told someone he’s not even close to teabagging my body.

    That of course obviously implies that I suck bad enough in Halo matchmaking to be teabagged quite often.

    • BSlaughts says:

      hehe i feel your pain pup…

  10. HellCat says:

    I know i always go for the ass or face (not the codpiece, don’t want to catch an STD) but most people miss it all together.

    Poor co-ordination FTW

    • lol says:

      you can get an std from the ass… ALWAYS AIM FOR THE EAR

      • Harsky says:

        AAWW YEA MAN!!!! always go for the ear!!!!

        • nick says:

          omg stop youre turning me on!

          no i am just kidding but ya go for the ear!

  11. MGH1138 says:

    Teabaggin’: You’re doin’ it wrong…most of the time.

  12. neoxdonut says:

    So true, LMAO

  13. Gorebashd says:

    Never would have guessed it. Although i dont Teabag often due to the fact i feel its disrespectful. but if some goof wants to do it to me lol why not do it back.

    Most times I have been teabagged it has been to the head tho.

    • tt savlonic says:

      I usualy reserve teabagging for people who talk trash, people who try to take you out with the AR or people on my team who have been so crap they deserve a betrayal bag

  14. Andrew Jensen says:

    I usually only;y get tea bagged when alive…

  15. Pingback: Where People Teabag You in Halo 3 | Default Prime

  16. Natonator says:

    Couldn’t lag possibly affect where your opponnt witnesses your act? I’m sure i hit the chest/head everytime…

    • Gilver says:

      Yep. That’s probably what happens a lot.

      But even then, I’ve seen people teabag me accurately. But many times I see them Teabag “my” back, or my legs.

      I do it right and go for the head.

      One more thing…
      The funniest thing to see is a group teabag…especially when its your friend on the other team (Due to party splits in social games) and they kill you and Teabag you all at once…ah…good times…

      • shinobi1kinobi says:

        I believe the proper term is gang-bag.

  17. Monkey_lord says:

    That pie chart is so right. Yesterday on Avalanche a dude (I think) killed me with a battle rifle and I was in perfect tea bag position (Face up, legs spayed out) and the guy walked ten feet (or so) over and just humped the ice. Tea bag fail in my opinion.

  18. halo.pink says:

    teabagging is fun. Usually When I teabag its in real life, after I knock my friends down. I also usually have to run pretty fast, or have sore balls for the rest of the week

  19. porkstein says:

    One quick dip on the face is all it takes for me. Smart, quick, and brutally effective.

  20. Gunlat3M says:

    Isn’t this based off of host? I’ve seen people teabag nowhere near my body, but they say that my body is right under them… so this is based off of connection.

    It’s not a fail, it’s differentiating models.

  21. holy crap thats true i perfer to teabag ith legs XD if its a girl

  22. Snipercidal says:

    That’s great. I never thought much about how the lag or difference between consoles could affect it. I just thought the guy that was teabagging my foot was an idiot. I enjoy giving the occasional teabag, but it is usually only after receiving one or as punishment for someone talking sh*t during the game.

  23. T Moneyzz says:

    i alwayz teabag in CoD when I see a sniper, then stab them so it shows up on killcam.

  24. eddie barcomb says:

    i love t bagging

  25. tess says:

    i just think it funny when people go to teabag you and they do it like 10 feet away from your body

  26. Mongolish says:

    uh….. i have tested it with my friend and the bodys do not always look the same way dead on every tv so this is false

  27. luke says:

    what i find funney is when some 1 kills you, and then starts to t-bag the floor no where near to your body and yet your body still manages to bounce up and down every so often. (obv lag or the console thing)
    i get anoyed when you start a game and you team leaves so its just you vs the other team, and you get killed and they all suddenly get the urge to t-bag you. well 1 time tha happend on Narrows and i spawned near the rockets, picked them up whent to my X saw all 5 of them STILL t-baggin so i shot 2 rockets at them ang got a kiltrocity, extermination so i ran over and t-bagged them.
    t-baggin is only nessacery when there are mouthy di*ks in the pre game lobby or if you get t-bagged (my oppinion) + 1 or 2 quick t-bagges usualy does the job.

  28. Alex says:

    This is true, I only teabag when the other team starts…

  29. iRoflCopterX says:

    See, the key is to /purposely/ teabag the ground ten feet away from the dead body. That way you make ‘em think they’re lagging. It’s all psychological.

  30. qwertyuiop says:

    I actually don’t care that much where I teabag, its not so much about the action, but about the emotional connotation it implies. I don’t care how I say it, i just wanna make the BK realize that he can suck my balls…

  31. dave says:

    not only is teabagging disrespectful but….. doesnt that make out that the guys that are doing it constantly actually do like other men sucking thier gorgonzola’s?

  32. shadowshot2 says:

    Nowhere near the body is often if at all.

    Usually in group baggin’, three right there, and one off on his own T bagging the ground looking straight up and shooting.

  33. luke says:

    i hav a m8 tha use to t-bag 24/7 so 1 day he killed me on a 1 on 1 n t-bagged like usual, so i just said to him ‘wow i never new that you are this sexualy frustrated that you always have to t-bag in a game . . shows you dont get any in real life’ he hardly t-bags now. (i dont no if what i said was true or not but it has worked on 6 other people.)

    P.S. the other day i was playin a game on valhalla and there was a guy on my team with a plasma pistol shooting at where the sniper spawns i was like ????? when i saw him, and ran of, i got killed and spawned next to him again as he betrayed one of my team mates whitch had recon <——(no big deal) n the plasma pistol guy started to t-bag the recon person, once again i ran of, got killed after a bit and spawned next to the plasma pistol guy (still w8ing 4 the sniper) so just as i was about to run off the recon person spawned next to me, threw a granade at the random plasma pistol (pp) guy n shot him in the head with his br, then as the pp guy died the sniper spawned so the recon person took it and we both t-bagged the pp guy. lol it was totaly worth it and very funney.

    • someone says:

      …huh?

  34. lXI Nick lXI says:

    while sometimes the body is in different locations for different players, more often than not, for me at least, my teammates and I are seeing the same dead body…it usually only different for the two teams but the same for members of the same team…

    PS: check out halo3gophers.com and join!

  35. Rhainor says:

    Sadly, this practice is nowhere NEAR as funny now as it was back in the Halo 1 days, when it was known simply as “corpse humping”.

    • bs angel says:

      You gotta admit having the bodies respond to postmortem stimulation is kinda fun now though. I don’t teabag, but during custom goof off games I have been known to melee bodies until they are pushed into the river while discussing proper corpse disposal.

  36. Entity says:

    why not go for the “hit the body on the downward thrust” technique? then you are sure to hit any part of the body you are aiming for.

  37. that is the truth about no here near the body i saw 3 ppl on the other team just tea bag the ground for 2 minites then they went to play

  38. urban twisticle says:

    I prefer to flip players onto there stomach and butt bag them

    when I do this in social games I baah like a sheep

  39. you again says:

    Here is a good example of someone that enjoys tbagging

    http://www.bungie.net/Online/Halo3UserContentDetails.aspx?h3fileid=60347552

    • Snipercidal says:

      Nice. Too bad he disappeared before you finished up.

  40. FearandLoathing says:

    in my opinion, teabagging is a sign of repressed homosexuality. and there should be another graph for the percentage of people that earn the right to teabag….the numbers would be staggering in favor of people who dont come close to deserving it. oh you assassinated me when i was not playing for a brief period of time and just standing there? well congrats, you earned that one. lol

  41. Allstarpro says:

    I dont teabag ppl… I potato sack them…. now thats how it should really be done.

  42. hydrohawk says:

    haha

  43. Im A GOOD MaN says:

    The only time teabagging makes sense is when you do it to an Elite with the Combat (Original) helmet. That way you have access to the mouth which will be WIDE open. Also, only teabag people who actually have it coming to them. You’d look like a complete moron teabagging every corpse you find.

  44. Chubby Belly says:

    the great tea bag. all created for the purpose of shoving the balls inside one’s mouth (dead or alive)!

    Well, the constant furosity and speed of combat and battle keep us at a quick pace! We must compensate by tea bagging wherever the hell we can while we can.

  45. Adam says:

    Incidently the red looks like pac-man. just thought I’d throw that out there.

  46. pimpnamecandy says:

    it is so true, because when they teabag me…it is nowhere near my BODY hahaha. And i tell them that they need some teabagging skills, they get mad LOL

  47. BigCountry1369 says:

    I only teabag when I’m drunk

    =)

    • bs angel says:

      In other words, ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

  48. Penguinator says:

    I always teabag, then smack the body, then jump-hump. It’s offensive and over the top, but hell, it’s worth it!

  49. Variety is the spice of life…. But depth perception is the key to every good TEABAG!!!

    TEABAG!!! TEABAG!!! TEABAG!!! TEABAG!!! TEABAG!!!

  50. Seemingly random, but relevant fact: At the time of this post there were 69 replies to this topic.

    I can’t recall the last time I saw someone land their teabag on their intended target. They’re never anywhere near it.

  51. Lexy says:

    Most satisfying thing ever… assassinating some idiot who is too busy tea bagging you or your team mate to notice. Love it.

    • BSlaughts says:

      i think teabaging should be worthy of a medal…like the beatdown medal. (which is a pointless medal)

  52. voucherducket says:

    lol in halo 1 and two the bodys didnt move when u t bagged in but in halo 3 they do now lol thanx bungie for that usefullness to make tea bagging closer to reality

  53. ofuel says:

    When playing CTF and I have the flag and kill someone with it… I usually drop the flag directly on their body and t-bag the ground in front of them. It’s hilarious.

  54. DivinerSage says:

    Hmmmm it seems you are right. I watched every match today in the theater where my opponents and allies performed superfluous “celebratory crouching”. Your calculations seem to be right on the money. I have a question to ask. What is the criteria for a properly executed “celebratory crouch”.

    My definition is when positioned on top of your adversaries corpse perform two quick crouches looking straight down at your victim. But Ive seen just one crouch to the upperbody while moving in a circular motion (as to smear ones victims face). Ive also seen a rapid almost seizure like crouch thats more like a gyration.

    Also what category does a “celebratory crouch” that ends with the one performing the crouch getting owned because he was too busy “celebrating”. Actually I will have to go back and study my films in the theater but Im guessing somewhere between 10-15% end in the “celebratory croucher” getting owned.

    Truthfully only when my opponent “celebratory crouches” my teammate and I own him in the process I perform not a “celebratory crouch” but a full blown “teabagging” my term for it is really “potatoe sacking”.

  55. FlammablePoet says:

    ^That guys funny ^

  56. Tammy says:

    I’m not much for teabagging. The whole idea of getting off on a corpse doesn’t have any appeal, but I suppose if you can’t get a willing live participant, some are desperate enough to try a dead man. Yes, I am being sarcastic, but if any of that offended you because you took it seriously, that’s sad. Personally I could care less whether or not you teabag, and even less about where. A teabagging player makes for an easy kill, so as long as you’re on the other team, keep it up.

    I prefer a good final corpse punch over a teabag. Rather than some so-called sexual humiliation due to teabagging, a good corpse punching pretty much just says “I won, and you lost.”

  57. Zuratuel says:

    i always mix it up abit, just moving slightly to the left or right while spinning and bagging, i dont even aim, thats probably where “no were near the body” part of the graph comes from.

  58. Helljumper112358 says:

    I don’t particularly enjoy the teabag, but I do use zombie protocol. One shot to the head just to be safe… don’t want those dead people poping up behind you.

    • Dante says:

      Switch to the ole Magnum and put a round in the cranium? Like that lots! Classy and finale…

  59. You can’t really have a poll on where people teabag because you can’t really tell. This happens because of minor lag (the person teabagging sees you right under him on his screen, but on your screen his humping a flower on the ground). Also, shouldn’t their be a graph for the number of people that beat their kill or shoot a whole clip of needles into the body’s chest? So go Bungie for putting a link to a graph that is completely and utterly useless (well almost useless, it’s still kinda funny that they made a graph for this).

    Blarg!

    Punisher Out..

  60. ~QF~Poseidon says:

    SOOOOOO true!!!
    People just don’t pay attention when they teabag. When I teabag, I always look down to make sure I’m on their face. The only problem is, I get assassinated A LOT when I’m doing this.

  61. Bob says:

    teabagging is what defines halo…

  62. what Are Yuu On About? says:

    Yuu Do Know Tea-bagging In every state of form is gay? Yuu humping another guy anywhere is gay, yes even the head, and it is disrespectful, but the funniest when the people who do it to yuu are losing by bout 20 haha

  63. what Are Yuu On About? says:

    And Do Yuu Not Understand, Peoples Dead Bodies Are In differnt Places when Yuu Die, So It Hardly Ever Stays The same On each Screen, Whilst Yuu Might be Humping His Head On His Screen, They Might See there Own Dead Body Somewhere Else!! Why Do Yuu People Not Understand This And this Is What the Graph Represents, as It Says ‘where Peole Teabag YOU In Halo 3′ Not ‘Where YOU Teabag people In Halo 3′ Its Imple And That Is Why. Maybe You Should Get Back to School and stop Playing Halo 3 So Much, Do some Learning.

    • Hey…way to say exactly what i said XD

      Learn how to make a point chap!

      Punisher Out

  64. GeneralCupcakes says:

    I know It differentiates from lag, but emotionally, teabagging can really get you pissed (Know matter where it lands!)

    • what Are Yuu On About? says:

      That Is True :L

  65. whiterazor says:

    i think u forgot to add the tea bagging part that includes getting beat down while being tea bagged

  66. Dante says:

    Always done over my body, which requires concious effort to move there after killing, also a potential for getting the offender killed.

    So this pie chart is crap.

  67. Helveck says:

    I prefer to start at the feet and slowly slide my way up.

    • I Like It…I Love It …I WANT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  68. crazy raptor187 says:

    i always teabag when they least expect it =]

  69. XshadowfexX says:

    i like to give a good baggin now and then but ppl rarely miss on my schreen there all dead on

  70. XshadowfexX says:

    btw any idea when live is gonna be back up? its been 24 hours for me..

  71. ESK Metal Matt says:

    Don’t forget we have to think about our futures here. Safe Teabag, use a bubble shield.

    • squasha240 says:

      teabagging is only fun if u only do it sometimes and at the right moment like i have this friend who teabaggs whenever he gets a kill!!!!!! so stupid also gangbagging is so funny!!!

  72. squasha240 says:

    this is an addon from my last post……….. I also like teabagging my self it is so funny if u haven’t tried it give it a go!!

  73. squasha240 says:

    if anyone wants some awesome maps on halo 3 just send me a friend request (squasha240)

    • squasha240 says:

      i also have some awesome videos of teabagging!!! so send me a friend request (squasha240)

  74. plungedryu2012 says:

    My head and bashed at the same time

  75. Admiral Madden says:

    it’s not lag that makes people miss, it’s the fact that they are afraid of the corpse really being HAWTY… she would probably play dead just so that she can bite!

    • bs angel says:

      LOL!

    • SEE EVEN THIS GUY’S THEORY VOIDS THE GRAPH AND MY ORIGINAL STATEMENT AT THE SAME TIME!!!

      DROP IT LIKE ITS HOT BABY!

      Punisher Out…

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  78. Morpheus says:

    I usually don’t teabag unless they did it first.

    In which case, I go for the back.

  79. Join us at the Risen Clan. We are a growing Halo community based on giving gamers a chance to get together and have some fun. We will by provide you with tournaments, friends, and give you the chance to submit your videos and game pics to me for our own (and more fair) Risen Clan Favorites.

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