Eight Reasons Every Girl Should Date a Gamer

Let’s face it ladies, the vast majority of single guys are jerks. In their perpetual quest for the ever elusive score, they will stoop to almost any level for their typically all too brief moment of ecstasy. They pretend to be things they aren’t, they lie about significant aspects of their lives, and they will tell you absolutely anything they think you want to hear in the hope of being granted access to your otherwise off-limits pants. While wading through the treacherous waters of dating is a daunting task, there is one often overlooked niche group that deserves more attention than it receives. What group you might be wondering? Why gamers of course! Here are the top eight reasons why every girl should give the gamer in her life a shot at romance.

Eight Reasons Why Every Girl Should Date a Gamer

gift giving just got easier

Males are a difficult breed to shop for. Sure, there’s an occasional item they lust after but typically you spend your time racking your brain for the one nonexistent thing they don’t have yet. With gamers, trying to find the perfect present is one dilemma you will never have. There’s always a new title, a new accesory, a new handheld, a new console, a new collectible, a new something that relates to their passion for gaming that they cannot live without. And that’s exactly what you can get him for his next birthday. Or Christmas. Or anniversary. Or whatever the next special occasion may be.

no more wondering what you're going to do

Have you ever experienced one of those wonderfully circular conversations consisting of, “What do you want to do tonight?” to which the standard response is always, “Oh I don’t know, what do you want to do tonight?” which is then followed by blank stares, growing anger, and an eventual unavoidable argument? If you date a gamer, you will never be faced with that frustrating experience again. Go see the latest movie adapted from a video game and then spend dinner picking apart the numerous reasons why it sucked bawls. Drive to the nearest big city and go to a video game convention, ogling the cosplay and getting ideas for joint costumes for the following year. Spend the afternoon at Best Buy playing the newest music game so you don’t have to drop another couple of hundred dollars on new and improved fake plastic peripherals. The possibilities are endless, which in this case is definitely a good thing.

no need for five course dinners

Sometimes, as females, we feel intense pressure to be superstars in the field of culinary arts. We are nurturers, we want to take care of the people we care about, and one way we enjoy doing that is by creating the most elaborately impressive and delicious meals we can dream up. Unfortunately our skill in that department is sometimes lacking but when you are dating a gamer, that never comes into play. Gamers are used to scarfing down their meals in between levels. They typically have finger-friendly morsels that are low maintenance and, more importantly, leave very little residue on controllers and things of the like. Gamers are just as happy ordering a pizza as they are with a nice home cooked meal so there is very little pressure to hone your food preparatory skills. Do whatever you are capable of doing and as long as it’s not Ramen, he’ll be as happy as a clam. Hey, you actually got back in the kitchen, right? That should be enough for him right there.

what are bars and strip clubs?

One of the most common occurrences that gets your guy in trouble is probably when he goes to the bar after work with his buddies without letting you know. The complete and utter lack of common courtesy, not to mention respect, is likely to get your blood boiling in no time flat. That’s something that will rarely happen, if ever, when you date a gamer. Gamers don’t want to go somewhere and hang out for an extended period of time talking about water cooler topics they don’t give a shit about. They want to go home and play their newest video game they picked earlier on their lunch break. They want to go home so they aren’t late for their clan challenge or latest scheduled raid. They want to go home, plant their ass in front of their 60″ inch HDTV, and game. Going to the bar or strip club? It never even crosses their mind.

finally, someone who understands your jokes

Have you ever said the most hilarious joke and instead of laughter, was faced with a look of complete and utter confusion? Have you ever seen something that reminded you of your favorite video game but quickly made the realization that your non-gamer boyfriend wouldn’t understand? Gamer culture is extensive and much more in depth than many people realize. Finding somebody who is compatible in that regard is priceless. When you see a Target sign with the upper right quadrant burnt out, imagine the joy you’ll feel in sharing that RRoD joke that is sure to pop into your head. When you each order dessert when having dinner out, you can share a laugh at the inevitable “The cake is a lie” quips that will quickly escape both of your lips. The best thing though? That pick-up line you’ve been practicing about him being Pac-Man, you being a Ghost, and him eating you all night long? That’s finally going to work. And how sweet it will be.

the romance is one of a kind

Flowers. Jewelry. Chocolates. Yawn. Does it get more boring than the same old tired gestures that are supposed to signify romance? Yes, you got down on one knee when proposing. Perhaps you could try something that hasn’t been done millions of times before in an effort to be unique. Recycling the same stereotypical romantic motions is not something a gamer knows how to do. Gamers express their love by designing custom levels within your favorite video game. They spell lovey dovey messages out of weapons in Halo 3′s Forge mode. They propose within the very video game you two spend the majority of your evenings playing. Even if other people don’t find zombies romantic, they hold a special place in your heart and that’s all that matters. Besides, those other people probably aren’t familiar with Left 4 Dead’s smokers and their insanely long tongues. Talk about hawt.

foreplay just happens to be your favorite pastime

Women may pretend to like scented candles but honestly, the overwhelming floral fragrance gives us migraines. We may also say we like the warm baths and the soft music but guys taking baths is just weird and elevator-esque music puts us to sleep. Now you know why we roll our eyes and feign headaches at the rather pathetic attempts of foreplay. Dating a gamer eliminates such see through strategies though because they know the advantages to popping in your favorite video game. There’s nothing like playing the last level of Halo: Combat Evolved, beating it by just a few seconds, and feeling the rush of adrenaline take over your body. Seize the moment, and your favorite player two, and beat the level that comes after that. He may have thought there was nothing better than beating his big hard boss, but that was before he met you.

you know your way around a joystick

Many of us have been around since the days of Atari, and others of us spent our childhoods wasting away quarter after quarter on various arcade machines. It’s safe to say we are more than a little familiar with a joystick. We relish the hardened feel of it. We know how firmly it likes to be handled. We’ve mastered the art of manipulating it, slowly at first and then a bit more quickly. We know when to stop, and when it’s safe to continue. We recognize the signs of when the game is close to being over. And then we know how to finish it. We know our way around a joystick, and thus we know you. I’m pretty sure it’s a match made in heaven.

50 Responses to Eight Reasons Every Girl Should Date a Gamer

  1. newguy2445 says:

    Fun article =P

    But mainly like the new look of the site. Very smexy ;)

  2. DeepCee says:

    :) You speak the truth !

  3. Jim 028 says:

    Happy Second Anniversary bs angel, nice new look to celebrate. :D

  4. ah angel…. another fabulous blog post that’s full if win… you made my morning! =)

    and the site is awesome… i like the dark mood you’re trying to set here… do i smell candles? ;-)

  5. angelofbacon says:

    I do believe you gave us this http://hawtymcbloggy.com/2008/10/15/spend-some-time-in-my-hill/ reason for not dating gamers, but we’ll just ignore that ;)

  6. nyhitman0401 says:

    NOOOOO!!!! FIRST YOU CHANGE H3S AND NOW HAWTY MCBLOGGY!!!!!! WHY!?!?!?!? *Starts Crying* I think im gonna punk!!!!!

  7. PurpleSteve says:

    A new look.

    It’s like a new pair of underwear. At first, it’s constrictive. But after awhile it becomes a part of you.

    Congrats BS

  8. tofudragon7 says:

    I can relate to some of these points but not all, you see my partner is also an avid gamer like myself but we are both female – I like to call this gamer/lesbian combination ‘The Ultimate Package’ – I never rated my joystick skills anyway :p.

    • I could not have picked a more sublime description for such a wonderful situation. Not that like, I fantasize about this sort of thing or anything.

      I don’t.

      Really.

      Shut up. :)

    • bs angel says:

      The joystick reference can be changed out quite easily. :)

      • SonofMacPhisto says:

        Biologically speaking, isn’t it essentially the same?

        (This is going to get way weirder before it’s over.)

        • And it’s only just begun

      • TofuDragon7 says:

        …It’s going to involve the analogue stick isn’t it?

        • SonofMacPhisto says:

          Only if you’ve been good, dearest TofuDragon7.

  9. Zwooosh says:

    Loled at the last one :P

    New site looks good :), but the black text above the textbox should be changed :S
    Quite hard to read now :(

  10. Das Kalk says:

    I agree with everything and will forward this to all female dating candidates!

    Also, I am in love with the new look, but the text around the comment boxes is black, just an issue you may want to address…

  11. Foman123 says:

    Hahahaha…. this is AWESOME.

    The “What are bars and strip clubs?” section is what the girls I have dated have loved the most about me being a gamer. I’ve been told a few times, “I never have to wonder where you are when you don’t pick up the phone — I know that you’ll just call me back when the match/level is over.”

    LOL!

    • bs angel says:

      You, sir, are better than me. I wait until the entire session is over! ;)

  12. Leeumm says:

    “That pick-up line you’ve been practicing about him being Pac-Man, you being a Ghost, and him eating you all night long?”

    Best quote I’ve ever seen. You win, angel. You win.

  13. Duardo says:

    felt like such a need after reading that

    • John Stvan says:

      You meant nerd right? I mean, that would only compound your nerdery and make your misspelling more ironic :)

  14. I’m still on the fence about the new design. One thing I don’t like much is how much contrast there is between the background and the text frames. Great post, though. I you nailed pretty much everything in it.

    (The “Notify me of follow up comments via email” text is black on a black background.)

    • soulofaqua says:

      I firmly agree with you on this! Also the black letters not being very readable on the anthracite grey.

  15. I believe we’ve found the greatest of all time and the name isn’t Ali. The look, the humor, the look (of the site), the wit, the everything. I’m floored in many ways. Now I finally know who it is that’s always in my head. What a job well done bsangel!

    • bs angel says:

      Aaawww, you’re the best Will. <3

  16. John Stvan says:

    Way to go Angel! Another great look! You sure do know what it takes to run a site well!

    As far as the dating a gamer idea, I couldn’t agree more… but that makes things for us men more difficult.

  17. Visitor at home says:

    these pictures Suck. Otherwise, awesome.

  18. I like the new look, its not incredibly drastic like facbook and myspace when they change.

    Girl gamers are Hawt! (get it, your a girl gamer and your HawtyMcBloggy… lololol i crack mehself up with boo puns… lol)

    • bs angel says:

      I see what you did there!

  19. Kato says:

    True true.

  20. MGH1138 says:

    There are bars where girls take their clothes off?

    Man, I really need to put my controller down every once in a while…

    Love the site’s new look! :)

  21. COL0NEL SANDERS says:

    Haha, nice.

    “Beating the big, hard boss.”
    I lol’d.

    :D

  22. davyboy94 says:

    Does this eman im loved ? : D

    (insert Elpoiio offensive text here)

  23. Oh man that was hilarious.
    And so true.

    And yet…. I feel… that…. umm….. i dunno.
    Something is lacking.

    Oh well

    Anyway, Site is now Hawtness. happyface. or happyfave, if that’s how you know me
    >.>
    <.<

    • That’s a very interesting avatar….
      Kinda fits me, I guess

  24. LAZR Blade 14 says:

    The girls in my town?
    Do not want.

  25. R3ign says:

    lol, very nice article. Finally the true has been revealed

  26. I judge my women on how many bites it takes them to eat a banana, though joystick skills combined with my coinslot skills would make a good combo.

  27. shadowsquid86 says:

    Actually, most gamer types are total dipsticks too. Actually, most of the male population fits into the dipstick catagory. Why do girls put up with us, again?

    • Wait a minute. Speak for yourself buddy. :)

  28. hmmmmm ive never heard that packman pickup line before but from what i hear your pretty hot :)

  29. Jakob says:

    Forwarding link to my wife now. It’s time for her to understand EXACTLY why she is attracted to a chunky, hairy, glasses-wearing nerd. Ya know, a Brian Posehn look alike!

  30. Joshy poo poos says:

    it is amazing where one place on the interwebz can take you to another place on the interwebz. A guy/girl post a thread on the Gamebattles.com forums with links to your halo 3 pick-up lines. I rofled at them and for the first time i am reading a bloggers posts and bookmarking them. This is probably the most win website ever. LOL posting a bulletin on myspace of this site.

    • bs angel says:

      Glad you found your way here! We have a decent amount of fun around these parts. :)

  31. Ragnarok Ark says:

    But I LIKE ramen

  32. Stephanie says:

    My lovely boyfriend, who is an avid gamer, posted this on my facebook wall, and you have enumerated all the reasons why I adore him. I’m not a gamer myself… he’s managed to teach me how to walk in Halo — I can’t aim for crap though, so I’m useless to play with. But I do play easy games with him like the Lego series, haha, and I listen to him when he gets all excited about new games and I ask questions and BOY do I know more about the back story of Halo than most other girls. But you know what? It’s cool. He’s not a douche. He’s loving. He’s the best boyfriend I’ve ever had. He’s my gamer, and I have grown to love falling asleep to the sounds of grenades exploding and swords clashing.

  33. Tim Acheson says:

    I love this blog. ;)

  34. Thors toe says:

    I am in love. Where can I find a gamer chick? :-)

  35. Smashlyn says:

    Aw I loved this! My boyfriend games a lot as do I. But right now he’s spending his nights with Halo Reach beta. :(

  36. Alec says:

    Also we know how to survive zombies invasions!

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