Friday Caption Fun, Round 40
March 27, 2009 86 Comments
I leave Saturday morning for a week long vacation. I was already excited, but I got even more excited when I saw that Rocket Race was this weekend’s Halo 3 double EXP playlist. Why you may be wondering? Because the last time I played this gametype in Multiteam, my friend and I (who had the all too common misfortune of being split up) both spawned as VIPs and had partners who refused to drive. We spent the entirety of the game standing on top of a base on Sandtrap hoping the indicator would spawn directly under us (it never did). Rocket Race would probably be fun if the randoms of matchmaking played it the way it was meant to be played, but enough about the douchebags who don’t have enough braincells to follow an objective. Let’s instead recap the last set of captions we did then have some fun with yet another screenshot!
- “When the Halo Series ended, many flood infection forms were laid off. Fortunately some found jobs working for Steam as head crabs.” (Mags89)
- “Grandma Yipyip, when did you get here?” (CrazedOne1988)
- “Little did Flapyip know that teasing one’s hair went out of style a few hundred years ago.” (Mizzy)
- “♪♫ …but I did not shoot the Master Chief. ♫♪” (RandomSauce)
- “Ninip tried to get off the methane and try a more ‘herbal’ gas. HE thought it was fantastical. But so did the parasite.” (retinence)
- “Nintendo decided to cancel the cross-over game when they realized that Bungie had a very different idea in mind concerning the design of Metroids.” (Sane Intolerant)
- “Is it a BLUE spider!?” (xp194)
- “Gee, your Flood smells terrific!” (Mace Windex)
- “Methane: It only takes once.” (Tactful)
Once again all of your comments are full of win. There was only one notable exception and that was nixproto who said, “Now instead of making seven references, Bungie is making references to Greek mythology… or bs angel. We couldn’t tell.” I think perhaps he’s been stalking my house and caught a glimpse of me waking up in the morning. While I go close my blinds, I’ll leave you to captioning this a-little-too-close-to-the-security-camera screenshot. Talk about a close-up!
Author: BloodRunner55
“Suck it Blue!”
“Oh I know what the ladies like…”
How to teabag over Xbox Live Vision… now with Spartan guide!
this isn’t really what they meant when they said “stick it to the man”
“Now for a limited time only. Get 25% off your next penis scan.”
Spartan Pr0n done the RIGHT way!
I didn’t believe him when he said ‘dual wield’…
In the beginning of the SPARTAN II project, many soldiers snapped under pressure. Their reactions varied.
Big Brother… Now eliminating privacy in 32 galaxies!
I said fuck the police not the police camera’s!!
Webcam sex… you’re doing it wrong.
bahaha
To shut BS Angel up she finally got a peek at what’s underneath the codpiece.. even so close to the camera she still hasn’t seen it.
Curses!
So, “Camera Shy” isn’t a Halo achievement?
No, it’s a Portal achievement.
General Vagueness, ruiner of jokes, not quite at your service.
Sick of all the criticizing of his play, he decided to violate their death-cams.
I am here for my close up Mr Zapruder
Poor red has been trying for hours to remove his dick from the box.
WIN!
~B.B.
Building on that…
“1: Cut a hole in the box!”
oops… disregard that, he’s obviously on step 2: Stuff yo’ junk in that box.
-Cortana, “Bet you can’t stick it.”
-”It’s over 9000!!!”
-”I’mma chargin’ my new crotch laser!”
-The new UNSC cameras just happened to be ‘pump’ activated…
-Don’t you guys know that Spartans are bred? How do you think they do it? Just like horses, guys, just like horses.
the brain
Enh! Enh! Enh!
“it’s only 3 inches… don’t laugh, some girls like it that wide.”
“are you sure you dont see it? im positive im a guy… zoom in more!”
It’s right there! What do you mean you can’t see it? Do yo have it zoomed in all the way?
UNSC’s Funniest Home Videos….here I come…
Man, the ways they disguise hidden cameras these days is just ridiculous.
While George distracted the security guys at Bungie, his buddies made off with the Recon armor.
One way or another, Fred was determined to get Chris Hansen’s autograph.
“Spartan 118, this is Echo Base. Um, your fly is down.”
Unfortunately, Red overestimated himself and never lived down the new nickname “CCTeeny.”
Red was assured that this was the quickest way of making it in Hollywood.
Damn…I didn’t know Ron Jeremy played Halo 3!
~B.B.
I got your shotgun right HERE!!
Can you hear me now?
You guys are silly =P
Disguised as a security camera, this little baby is siphoning waste from the Mjolnir armor. What you are witnessing here is the ever so mystical “Spartan Toilet”.
Red’s inner voice speaks in the Grunt language. Its been yelling “Now I got the Demon!!!!1″ for 3 hours.
A private picture of young Steven Spielberg.
is this the spartan sperm bank depository? i can’t do this with you watching…
“You want a Christmas card?! Here’s your Christmas card!”
They say the camera adds 10 pounds!
OMG, the camera can only do so much!
“I don’t think it’s enjoying it as much as I am.”
While the SPARTAN’s may have had their hormonal production reduced, certain anatomies were not altered. After this incident various video monitoring security staff had to be laid off due to insecurity issues.
Red here thought he was playing a cruel practical joke on Blue Team. Little did he know the camera belonged to bs angel
:D
When the going gets tough, the tough get…creative.
Blue: I don’t think he realises what teabagging is…
Jimmy liked Youtube, and had many friends. After his latest video, however, he just got mass-raped.
Steve had just been laid off by Red Command. Steve wanted to show them what he thought of that.
Paris Hilton enjoying a nice game off matchmaking… but what this? A crotch shot? This is truly out of character.
Jeff forgot the black spray paint, so he figured he would use white out instead…
Dude… wrong… XP
you wanna be a star? dontcha?
Help me, guys! It’s stuck!
“After a long hiatus, Bungie has announced their new ‘interactive’ Humpday.”
“Can..Can you see it now? Gooooood!”
“Finally, after hundreds of years, the experts are proven right. Our new technology has drastically reduced social interactions, as well as…. well, other kinds of interactions.
getting a prostate exam: you’re doing it wrong
Few people know that besides the helmet, MJOLNIR armor comes off in pieces, and in a certain order. Even fewer know the first piece comes off with a screwing action.
I’m not humping the camera! There’s a big scary lion thing under me!!
Not the first, nor the last time the Electric Eye would meet Ol’ One Eye.
Spartan recruits partake in the timeless tradition of letting the base AI calculate the correlation between the angle of your dangle, and the heat of your meat.
And he takes Saved Film smack talk to a whole new level…
This is the way the Spartan pees, not in the loo, but with a vaccuum…
(Kudos for whoever gets the reference :P)
You can’t stop the signal!
YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG
I’ve got your Five dollar foot-long right here.
A camera adds ten pounds? sweeeeeet.
Dude you know your mom watches this show right?
Red had to improvise when realised he had forgotten his camera-blinding paint.
Since Red couldn’t get the rest of his team do the heist with him, and he didn’t have any spray paint, he realized that the cameras were useless if those “watching” them were blinded for life.
“On the next episode of ‘Chief: The Man Under the Armour’, we’ve got some exclusive footage that will really work up your grunty thirst!”
Take a screenshot of this!
CAPTION THIS, HAWTY MCBLOGY!
shooting a porno….your doing it wrong
or
It’s time for my closeup!!!
or
security measures are getting more and more rediculus
The red’s plan backfired when they found out that the blue’s security guard was Richard Simmons.
Hurry up and steal the beers man, I’m startin’ to get a boner!
Hey Blue, SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND!
I can only imagine what’s going on in the other security camera’s head right now.
bs angel’s paranoia of people watching her finally went too far in a game of Halo.
Worst. Webcam. Ever.
Glory Hole – you’ll figure it out eventually.
“it hurts worse than Eddie Griffons Glass-Ass!”
“When asked about the incedent, Red claimed that the motion guided security camera came on to him.”
“BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING MEEEEE!”
Spartans Gone Wild!! [steel drum music plays]
“…and now for a close up shot… HEY! TOO CLOSE!!!!”
“Step One: Open hatch.
Step Two: Insert applicator into port.
Step Three: pull trigger–wait a second. This isn’t the ointment dispenser!”
Invisible Mongoose!
(singing) I always feel like somebody’s watching me!
“What do you see, Doc?”
“Hmm…two small intestines, a duodenum, half an appendix…what the?! Is that a rattle?!”
After finger prints and retina scans became useless, Red took their security procedures to a level that Blue wouldn’t think was possible.
“What a big penis you have Grandpa”
“The better to rape you with”
“Can you see me now?”
“NO! I AM NOT MOVING MY CROTCH OFF OF THE CAMERA UNTIL YOU GIVE US SOME REAL GUNS.”