Women love receiving jewelry for Valentine’s Day. It’s simply one of those life absolutes (much like the fact that you’ll probably get a bottle of massage oil and a pair of ridiculously ugly silk boxers you’ll be forced to wear while you rub her back in a nonsexual manner since the day is about “romance” and not about “getting some”). I may or may not have just realized that I hate Valentine’s Day. And that I probably should have been born with a penis. Anyways, since you already have a Left 4 Dead-themed Valentine at your disposal, I thought you may need some coordinating jewelry to go along with it. While these handcrafted pendants are reserved for someone else, you can try nicely asking the zombie-obsessed artist for your own set. Because girls love this shit. Seriously. They really do. I’ll take all four please!
Posted by soulofaqua on January 21, 2009 at 2:03 pm
yummy, they look like meatballs
Posted by FoxmanFX on January 21, 2009 at 2:04 pm
Perhaps March 14th will be more to your taste in terms of a holiday ;)
http://www.steakandbjday.com/
Posted by MK28 on January 21, 2009 at 2:27 pm
The first one looks like a raspberry; how frightening is that supposed to be? Unless you’re allergic to Fructose or something.
I personally think they’re gross, but then that’s probably the point of them, amirite?
As for owning a penis: pah, you’re constantly wondering around wanting to put it in different things, some of them quite unhealthy. They really should introduce a kind of pill that keeps it on a leash, maybe introduce penis restraint class at the age of 11, otherwise you’re just a slave to its whimsy.
If I had a pound for every time I’ve rolled over in bed and found something as ghastly as pic 3, smiling forlornly in my direction; with me hoping and praying that some kind of Demon Tooth Fairy will scrape it up, erase my memory and number from its mobile, and throw the Hellspawn in a cab…
Why, obese-loving philanthropic penis: why do you torment me so?!
Hey… are there… breasts with erect nipples surrounding that last one… Oh God… it’s out of control. I can’t seem to function as a normal human being and comment on Zombie Jewelry without alluding to the naked female form.
:(
Posted by VoltRabbit on January 21, 2009 at 2:28 pm
Absolutely stunning, my wife’s heart will melt! Take that Jared!
Posted by bs angel on January 21, 2009 at 2:31 pm
Best comment ever MK28. LOL! (And your observations are spot on with the last one!)
Posted by MK28 on January 21, 2009 at 3:07 pm
You’d think with their mottled grey colour, flecks of blood and sickly green bile oozing down and smothering the hard and fleshy areola would’ve put me off… you’d be wrong…
BRB er, tea break ;)
Posted by Queen 0f Blades on January 21, 2009 at 4:23 pm
As awesome as they are, I don’t think I could bring myself to wear one. People might look at me funny (funnier than usual, anyway).
Posted by Mr Angel on January 21, 2009 at 4:47 pm
Since you don’t like Valentine’s Day does that mean I am off the hook this year?!
Posted by bs angel on January 21, 2009 at 5:28 pm
Only if I’m off the hook as well!
Posted by DethPwn's Attack of the Lawlz on January 21, 2009 at 5:48 pm
Foxman FX, you’ve given ‘Beat the Meat’ a whole new meaning
Posted by Squishy on January 22, 2009 at 1:12 pm
………they do look like meatballs… but these balls shant be eaten… id buy that shit tho >.> and i dont even know why but i would….
when ive had enough halo 3 playing to get a girlfriend and i can get one of those as a present i’ll let you know how it goes XD
Posted by untamedzebra on January 22, 2009 at 1:12 pm
Did you just say you think you should have been born with a penis?? …
I like the second pendant. Reminds me of how you look in the morning just after waking up.
Posted by bs angel on January 22, 2009 at 2:05 pm
Well if it isn’t my sister swooping in with a ZING!!
And I don’t always look like that when I wake up. Just on my good days!
Posted by DethPwn on January 22, 2009 at 5:06 pm
Lawlz