Fraturday Caption Fun, Round 28
December 27, 2008 107 Comments
As I already have a habit of losing track of my days, with the craziness of the holidays I completely forgot it was Friday yesterday. Thus, after having a week off, we have a special Saturday edition of Friday Caption Fun! If you haven’t popped back into last week’s Happy Halodays community activity, make sure you take some time to go back and look at everybody’s contributions. There are some amazing, creative gems in that entertaining collection of Halo and holiday mashups. Right now though it’s time to caption another screenshot, after going over the responses from the last one we did of course.
- “I got your food nipple… RIGHT HERE!” (Salen)
- “Hey FlapYap, your participle is dangling!” (mendicantbias00)
- “Grunts tend to get a little TOO excited when Master Chief is around.” (Mace Windex)
- “Hey there YapYap! Whoa, is it cold out here or is that the way it’s supposed to look?” (the Light Show)
- “It is here that the Chief discovered that the Kamikaze Grunts weren’t talking about their grenades.” (Naepa34)
- “Due to the extremely bizarre genitalia of Unggoy, the “Visual Protection Filtering System” in the Mark VI armor kicked in to keep Master Chief from going utterly mad.” (Faren22)
- “And in other news: An Unngoy was arrested outside the window of bs angel’s apartment tonight on the grounds of minute exposure. Amidst a fit of giggles, bs angel is not pressing charges.” (MK28)
After studying that picture more, I would say poor little guy because the rectangle is so small but that really is some serious girth so I don’t feel all that bad for him. While the next screenshot up for your captioning pleasure doesn’t have any strategically placed censor bars, it does present a Spartan in a rather awkward situation. Caption away!
Author: Nihilus Shadow
It was too late for Master Chief to realize that Snake’s tactics don’t work in Halo.
Barrell Roll – Yer doin’ it wrong.
The UNSC had to cut the budget on the drop pod department. Now it’s more like the “rolling barrel” department.
I’m the man in the box
Even spartans bully each-other by shoving them into trash cans.
Rookies always fall for the “Bobbing For Recon” prank.
“After destroying the Ark, Master Chief found it difficult to find work. He managed to get a gig filling in for Oscar the grouch on sesame street, only to find that his immense size limited his usefulness…”
“stupid grade nines….”
“fish in a barrel”
Well they said the new recon gear was one size fits all!
*Grunts singing* – Ding dong, the Spartan’ dead! You dropped a barrel on his head! Ding dong the bad ol’ Spartans dead!
Forget Recon. This is the new armor Bungie’s released that everyone wants- Water Barrel.
“They’ll never get me in here…”
whoa! so this is where the secret stash of Cortana pron was hidden!
or…
KER-SPLAT!!!
Master Chief moments before his Niagra Falls barrell fall
“In other news, the gonk droid, found in the lego Star Wars videogames, was found in Halo today.”
It was a slow news day.
The oldest trick of sawing a human in half OR the greatest way to kill a spartan?
They can’t see me, I can’t see them!
Anyone else think the rocks are pretty? Blue did… and then this happened.
Spartans sleep with their shields off, but they have a substitute.
I didn’t know the Chief drank THAT much Gatorade.
Gonk Droids? This is Halo, not Star Wars.
“OOOOOO there’s a cookie in here”
“JESUS CHRIST–WHAT’S GOING ON?!” *Flattened by falling barrel*
“What? I was thirsty.”
Spartan: Huh? But you said this was a banshee!
Master Chief’s not gettin’ fatter, he’s just retaining water.
“Unfortunately for Blue, he learned the hard way that the reds could see right through his disguise.”
Caption Time: More fun than a barrel full of SPARTANs!
Caboose’s fixation with cheese has once again led to him getting lodged in the humane traps that the Red Team scattered around Valhalla.
-or-
Be vewy vewy quiet. I’m hunting Bwue Team! Huh-huh
“They’re the wrong trousers, Arbiter, and they’ve gone wrong!”
— Steve
In the wake of the war with the Covenant, Earth was facing a drought and the technology for producing rain had become very expensive.
Someone suggested a simpler method.
It didn’t turn out so well.
“during the Depression, the Chief, AKA Houdini, (did you really think that grunt brainz were made of confetti? well I guess only stubbs really knows that.) had to cut back on his props for the magic show… he now has only one box that doesn’t open, and rather than a volunteer, he uses his empty suit of armor.
now the common theme of all his performances is Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.”
“after realizing how much of a hit Standoff was, Caboose thought that making a suit out of boxes would make him blend in… he was the first to test it in combat, and BOY was he wrong!”
Admiral Madden
“Church! Help! I wanted to be like Snake Solid and I got stuck in this box!”
After the all night Christmas Party, Blue woke up drunk, wet, and very confused.
*As the barrel inevitably starts to roll.* Rollin’ rollin’ rollin’, keep them doggies rollin’ Rawhiiiiide.
“Church!, you lied to me.There was no Muffin in here?”
It’s the new Can O’ Spartan!
“Ever since the budget cut, the warthog has been acting strangely….”
Red Team: 1 Blue Team: 0
Solid Snake Wannabe: -1000
Alternitively…
Stealth. Ur doin it wrong!
The Blue team’s attempt to smuggle themselves in via the Red base’s supply shipment had gone disastrously wrong.
wait a minute… There’s no water in here!
GET ME OUTTA HERE! Those Brute jockies stuffed me in the trash again!
Out of body bags, Blue Team was forced to place their dead in beer kegs.
“Tapping the admiral” becomes “tapping the Master Chief”.
1: “Cut a hole in a box”, 2: “Put your junk in that box”, 3: “Make her open the box… and that’s the way you do it!”
Snake makes it look a LOT easyer
it’s a Spartan in a barrel, a Spartan in a barrel babe
it’s a Spartan in a barrel, a Spartan in a barrel girl
Original-Dick in a box
“Snake? Snake!? SNNNNNAKE!”
The water barrel could only hope that his half-spartan disguise would get him past enemy lines.
Richard had wondered what a ‘Low budget supply drop’ meant. Now he knew.
1. “Hey look, I can see my house from here!”
2. Due to budget cuts, the top-secret UNSC project codenamed “TARDIS” could not afford an original, blue-painted box, and instead had to make do with the rubbish bin outside the office.
Warning: Beware of falling boxes.
If Achmed won’t come to the Spartan: ‘Ai keell yu!’
Seeing as we broke the Galactic record en all, could someone let us all out now… please. Okay fellas: who dropped the cheese-skunk.
So… you come here often?
A Spartan tootsie pop!
Ooh, I found a penny! Just my luck; it’s fake.
Of all the lousy tricks to pull on a guy the night before his wedding… and I think that stripper stole my wallet too.
Screw conventional wisdom Dan; this new ‘Halo vs Transformers’ line is gonna knock em dead: Spartans transforming into
Warthogs is old hat: Spartan’s turning into boxes is where it’s at! Get me Steve in Production: I want these badboys good to go by September.
I tell ya, asteroids aren’t the only thing that fall out the sky!
After the spartan was mugged for his armor he jumped into the barrel and tried to run back to his base… It didn’t end well.
Hey little fella… you okay? That looked like it hurt… a lot.
He was just splattered by a two ton ammo crate, Dave: Of course he’s not okay!
I found more of him over here. Cool: I think we might be the same shoe size.
Pull up Icarus 1.
So Detective, what do you think killed him?
Yes honey, it does look big, in fact, it looks like it has consumed your whole body!
Upmarket hobos.
Don’t cry sweetie, I know it looked bigger in the brochure but at least we can see the beach!
Concordantly, while your first question may be the most pertinent, you may or may not realize it is also the most irrelevant…
You don’t have the key to get me out of here, do you?
Er, no.
This just goes to show that the content of SPAM is… questionable.
When I tell you I’m gonna send you home in a box: I really mean it!
Kathy, could you book the table for nine; I’m going to be a little late.
‘Now why couldn’t you just put the bunny back in the box?’
Triple winning Hide-and-seek champion, my ass!
No need to explain:
http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/f/f0/Efgthread.png
Okay so the attack plan is set, but we’re still going to need something to ram the front gate and infiltrate their camp… any ideas, Caboose?
Oh man, the things I do for the love of BS Angel’s Friday Caption Fun.
Hey, there is no naked picture of- *KABOOM!*
Looks like the developers of the MJOLNIR armor started to get a little low on their budget.
“Caboose was highly confused as to why there were no cookies at all at the bottom of the barrel at all, contrary to what the reds told him before mysteriously running away…”
(little typo / grammar error there, let me fix it)
“Caboose was highly confused as to why there were no cookies at the bottom of the barrel at all, contrary to what the reds told him before mysteriously running away…”
Spartans got bullied a lot and throwing them in trash cans was the only thing that worked.
Maaaan, it’s heavy! What’s in this barrel… A DEAD BODY?
peppy hare: DO a BARREL ROLL!
prom night dumpster spartan.
“All the Chief ever needed…was a little space.”
After having her period she hid in the only place available
“A magic trick went horribly wrong earlier today when the man inside of the box was ACTUALLY sawed in half. Back to you, Bob.”
“I can’t get up! Help me Ralphy!”
And in other news, a Spartan has been suspended from sentry duty today: for sleeping on the job. Suspicions were first aroused by colleagues hearing loud snoring noises and then the random appearance of two flailing legs. The Spartan in question claims to have been dreaming of running away from an obese, sword-wielding Spartan and a crotchless Unnggoy…
Damn that stupid cat of yours Jilly; always leaving dead things on the back door!
“Snake. Snake?! SNAAAAKE!!!!”
or
“After the UNSC released the Hayabusa mod kit onto the market as an optional extra for the Mjolnir armor, funds began to run low…”
or
“He put out the fire, but the g-forces removed his arms…”
Ok guys, jokes over. GET ME OUT!
After seeing the picture for Hawty McBloggy’s last caption contest, Bob hid inside a trash can for the next month and a half.
After a long night of drinking, the blue team all woke up in barrels
Cortana: Do a….. barrel roll?
Wow! I wonder what’s in my Christmas present..
“Due to Bungie’s split with Microsoft, the design budget for new Armor has diminished slightly…”
Talk about barrel-chested!
Explorer: “This barrel seems to have used the spare limbs from the countless battles here to fashion itself a personal mobility system, it’s still working out the kinks”
Oh, and happy Christmas everybody!
so that’s what the guardians look like….
Companion Chief
“Here are the Halo Rodeo, Master Chief is trying out for a clown position.
… Did the chopper kill him?”
Curse you BUNGIE!!!! You made the kill-boxes to large. :’(
Exhibit A: Why the UNSC No Longer Issues Beer Kegs to Special Warfare Teams.
It was at that moment, when Private William finished every last drop of water in that keg, that he spotted the text despicting “Septic Tank” at the bottom of the barrel.
He suddenly found out where Spartans put their excrement. Multitudes of mysteries solved, all suddenly cut off by the fact that he suddenly suffered from a sudden death sickness of death.
Lest we forget, William the Blue.
Label reads: WHUPASS!!! Now contains 100% more Spartan II
or
“I Told you I was gonna open a can-a-Whupass! You just better pray yer gone before that Spartan gets out of it…”
…And then Samus realized that those training robots did look funny after all…
Bring out cha dead!
you’ve been banned!
Apparently, Blue’s dad Bob boinked a barrel, and, well, you know the rest
After the party, Bob was found passed out, piss-drunk, with a barrel on his head, on his parents’ lawn.
In retrospect, my caption sucks.
Cylindrical objects always were Bob’s worst enemies!
Upon finding themselves unable to extract any beer from their keg, the frat boys of Gamma Delta Sigma sent in Fred for a closer look.
“See here’s your problem with yer keg…there’s a Spartan in the tap…”
“In my day, we didn’t have no fancy schmancy tents! We had a tarpaulin and a tin can! AND WE HAD TO SHARE THE TIN CAN!”
“Well see what had happened was we were trying to play TMNT, and Jim said he wanted to be Splinter. He crawled into that tube over there and well…here we are.”
DAMN YOU DONKEY KONG!!!!!
Being blue this Spartan thought he’d be camouflaged in the barrel of water, he was wrong.
(And yes water is blue)
did I leave the water running? no, and here’s proof.
::Jackass Theme Music Plays::
Hi I’m Master Chief, and this is the Water Barrel Roll…
Chief! You got it all wrong, step two only says stick your junk in that box, not your entire torso. Idiot.
this is what happens at spartan frat boy party when the drunkest spartan decides to pull a “HEY Y’ALL WATCH THIS!!!!!!!!!”
Master Chief really has to stop falling for the “Special Edition Cortana Avatar” gag.
every one gasped in horror as Bobby challenged the guardians new “Ban Barrel”…
“Hey…Why is there a fusion coil in here?”