While Grifball fanatics will be happily occupied earning a double dose of experience this weekend, I actually have other plans that trump even the mightiest of the gravity hammers. Today is my wedding anniversary where I happily celebrate an amazing man who not only puts up with my obsession with gaming but also encourages it. Whenever I ask him why he keeps buying me games, he begins to mumble incoherently about how I am like Cortana and some weird incessant nagging in his head. Don’t know, don’t care because I get my games and he gets his … wait. What the hell is he getting out of this?! While I go figure that out, I will leave you to captioning yet another screenshot (after recapping last week’s of course). Maybe I should go do the dishes or something. Shit.
- “Oh… I know what the ladies like.” (Ragingterror)
- “Let’s see tank beat this!” (humrh360)
- “The fans had called for a more realistic pistol in Halo 4 that still captured the feel of Halo 1’s pistol. The compromise seemed to please them.” (Jillybean)
- “Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid.” (urk)
- “It’s light. Handle’s adjustable for easy carrying, good for righties and lefties. Breaks down into four parts, undetectable by x-ray, ideal for quick, discreet interventions. A word on firepower. Titanium recharger, three thousand round clip with bursts of three to three hundred, and with the Replay button – another Zorg invention – it’s even easier.” (snorkle256)
- “Say hello to my little friend.” (Louis Wu)
- The EL-33T-CF, codename Cluster Fuck, is the ultimate anti-noob weapon this model comes with Noob-seeking rockets, particularly useful for Ammo-hoarding, solo-hog driving teammates. (WARNING! IF YOU ARE A NOOB OR ARE EXPERIENCING SIGNS OF NOOBISHNESS DO NOT HANDLE EL-33T-CF AS NOOBISH USE OF THIS WEAPON IN CLINICAL TRIALS RESULTED IN MILD TO MODERATE DEATH.) (Fushiko)
- “And you thought the n00b combo was bad..” (petetheduck)
Star Wars quotes are always good in my book, but The Fifth Element ones as well? You guys and gals rock! Let’s see what you can come up with this week. I call this screenshot, “Chocolate, Lemon, or Chunky?” (you thought I was just perverted, I’m actually gross too!) but what is your witty caption for it?
Author: Commander Rx28
Posted by newguy2445 on November 14, 2008 at 3:43 am
The Chief meant it when he said he was going to beat the shit out of the Covenant.
Posted by nixproto on November 14, 2008 at 3:48 am
“I bet I can pull this sink off the wall!”
Haha, more “inappropritate halo 3 screenshot of the week” please !
Posted by [QQ Church] on November 14, 2008 at 4:14 am
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to shoot my gun in your mouth. Yours was too deep in mine.”
Posted by Drag0n D214 on November 14, 2008 at 4:21 am
its ok buddy you’ll look like lindsay lohan one day *wispers to self* or you just might die
Posted by john010117 on November 14, 2008 at 4:32 am
Happy anniversary!
As for the quote, “Oh, so that’s what makes you Brutes sick! I promse I won’t do THAT ever again.”
Posted by DareDizzle on November 14, 2008 at 4:42 am
“Saw VI”
Posted by Louis Wu on November 14, 2008 at 4:50 am
“Dude… those food nipples sneak up on you.”
Happy Anniversary, HB!
Posted by Tristan on November 14, 2008 at 4:53 am
The new shock website : “1 Chief, 1 Brute”
Posted by mendicantbias00 on November 14, 2008 at 4:54 am
Congrats to you and your husband angel, I hope you guys have a fun night planned!
Caption:
“Look I realize its your 21st birthday, but that doesnt mean you have to take every shot someone buys you all at once. *sigh* n00bs.”
Posted by SPOC XLI on November 14, 2008 at 5:15 am
“Here, let me hold your hair back for you.”
Posted by Elvis Diaz on November 14, 2008 at 5:24 am
That’ll teach you Freshman!
Posted by Jedi Guy on November 14, 2008 at 5:47 am
“Silly brute. That’s not how you sit on a toilet!
Posted by AusQB on November 14, 2008 at 6:01 am
Happy Anniversary Angel!
Caption:
“And then he realized what the round thing was.”
Posted by madbox20 on November 14, 2008 at 6:05 am
WOW, you are right. That is corn!
Posted by A Shaky Shotgun on November 14, 2008 at 6:19 am
The Chief realized too late that you couldn’t give a Brute a swirly.
Posted by one crazy idiot on November 14, 2008 at 6:26 am
That’s his reaction to seeing 2 Girls, 1 Cup.
And happy anniversary!!!
Posted by snorkle256 on November 14, 2008 at 6:26 am
Yay I made it onto a list for once!
Ok here is this week’s
“Here sweety, let me hold your hair back.”
Posted by ManKitten on November 14, 2008 at 6:27 am
Brute: “Wait a second, THAT’S no Snickers bar*WHACK*”
——
Chief: “Time out guys, you gotta come look at what I did!?”
Brute: “WHAT DID YOU EAT?”
——
Brute: “Next time you clog your drain with grunt guts,Chief, call someone else.”
——
Chief: “Yeah!! Push that penny Freshman!!”
Posted by Reneiw on November 14, 2008 at 6:29 am
Caption:
Spartan: “Wait, so you’ve been pregnant for 4 month and you didn’t tell me?!”
Brute: “Did you not see the lump on my stomach?”
Spartan: “I thought you were just fat!”
Posted by StealthSpeed3 on November 14, 2008 at 6:39 am
BLLLLLLAAARRRGGHHHHHHH*phrrrt*HHHHHHHHHHHH
Posted by disco on November 14, 2008 at 6:49 am
Happy Anniversary to you and your husband!
______________________________________________________
Brute: RROD! arrrhghahahlbllllllaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
MC: It’s ok steven your mother and I will get you a new xbox tommorrow sweetie. Would you like an ice cream?
Brute: yes I would like that very much father.
MC: That’s a good steven, Hey everyone, we’re going to Dairy Queen!
Mastercheif doesn’t know how to say ‘no’ to his little steven.
Posted by calves on November 14, 2008 at 7:09 am
Next time…don’t call me to dd for you….wha…there can’t possibly be anything left to…ewww…i stand corrected
Posted by Mark on November 14, 2008 at 7:12 am
This toilet is not a natural formation…!
Posted by Mike on November 14, 2008 at 7:13 am
i don’t want to know where you found the only halo 1 magnum in the game… i don’t want to know why you ate it… but if it doesn’t come out this way, i WILL go in the other way and get it out my self!
Posted by Terminator182 on November 14, 2008 at 7:14 am
Chief: The Arbiter always puts my pistol in there…can you grab it for me?
Posted by Cailus on November 14, 2008 at 7:15 am
Some would call it depraved. Some would call it disgusting. The Spartans call it “fun time”.
Posted by Shaggydeath on November 14, 2008 at 7:16 am
Even a brute cannot drink the water in Mexico!
Posted by Das Kalk on November 14, 2008 at 7:25 am
YAY! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! HOORAY! MARRIAGE!
Also, here are my captions.
“Where’s my money bitch!”
“take it like a man!”
Posted by PsycoJoe on November 14, 2008 at 7:31 am
The Master Chief had no trouble sneaking up on the brute while he was praying to the Prophet of Ra’alf.
Posted by Mizzy on November 14, 2008 at 7:35 am
Happy Anniversary!
“That’s not a pickle…”
“No! Bad Brute! You know you’re not supposed to drink out of the toilet!”
Posted by nomis78 on November 14, 2008 at 7:40 am
#1
*documentary style voice* : Even entering into the 2500’s there had been no real change to the basic bullying techniques originally employed in the 1990’s”
#2
chief : i thought it was the grunts that were meant to act like dogs.
Posted by nomis78 on November 14, 2008 at 7:41 am
oh forgot this one
#3
“told you youd end up talking to god through the oval telephone”
Posted by schedonnardus on November 14, 2008 at 7:42 am
See, I told you that if you shove food up your ass, you will crap out your mouth [/southpark]
Brute: “Last night I went home with a 10, and woke up with a demon.”
Posted by DeepCee on November 14, 2008 at 7:43 am
Happy Anniversary Angel :)
And getting back to the caption.
“I thought you liked Indian food.”
Posted by SIR COFFEE on November 14, 2008 at 7:50 am
Shouldn’t have had that last margarita.
Posted by T07WRX5 on November 14, 2008 at 7:52 am
“It’s ok, everyone poops”
Posted by greenboom on November 14, 2008 at 7:58 am
That brute will have to snip his beard dreads if he wants out. The chief looks on shocked as he finds that his plumbing skills are his one weakness.
Posted by eclipser 84 on November 14, 2008 at 7:59 am
“BAD DOG!”
Posted by Mikeio on November 14, 2008 at 7:59 am
Gimme your lunch money dweeb, or do you want another wedgie?
Posted by Alessandro on November 14, 2008 at 8:00 am
“Staring all day into the toilet won’t bring poor old Goldie back. He’s gone, live with it and I promise I’ll buy you a new one.”
Posted by Guywithnoarms on November 14, 2008 at 8:03 am
“Having repeatedly having the demon’s smelly crotch plate thrust into his face after being owned, the Brute gave up all hope and humility and premeturely embarked upon a “Great Journey” of his own… to the toilet.”
There’s my caption.
Happy anniversary by the way. :P
Posted by DiscipleN2k on November 14, 2008 at 8:15 am
“No matter what he tried, Cheif could not get his new brute to stop drinking from the toilet.”
Happy anniversary, Hawty!
Posted by Morpheus on November 14, 2008 at 8:32 am
*vomits*
*cough*
“Goddamn you for putting ipecac in that burrito, Chief…..”
Posted by Jillybean on November 14, 2008 at 8:48 am
Happy anniversary!
(Caption or comment, I leave the decision to you)
Posted by Mojo on November 14, 2008 at 8:57 am
And you flushed our stash of Meth through the toilet, why?
Posted by Fusbun on November 14, 2008 at 9:00 am
When a Brute and the Chief ran out of ammo, they challenged each other to a drinking contest.
Posted by Chaelek on November 14, 2008 at 9:00 am
After the war, Chief found out that, despite looking like the average frat boy, Brutes just cannot hold their booze.
Posted by A Ghostly NINJA on November 14, 2008 at 9:01 am
Happy anniversary!
“I would’ve thought that a Brute could win the ‘Drink a gallon of milk without throwing up’ challenge. Well, I’ve been wrong before! Here, see if you can eat this package of crackers without taking a drink of water…”
Posted by HammerShot on November 14, 2008 at 9:04 am
Who…Does…Number 2..Work….For?
Posted by Naterator on November 14, 2008 at 9:17 am
End segregation! No more “brutes-only” water fountains!
Posted by BerserkerBarage on November 14, 2008 at 9:19 am
1.) Told you not to challenge Yoozel to a drinking contest. (<3s Boozel!!)
2.) One day I’ll be cuter than Mary Kate…
As to the anniversary, it reminds me of this:
The Three Rings of Marriage:
1.) Engagement ring
2.) Wedding ring
3.) Suffer-ring
And I only say that because I was forced to go try 10 different types of wedding cake 2 days ago. I never want to eat butter-cream icing again.
~B.B.
Posted by triptup on November 14, 2008 at 9:24 am
where’s prophet, brute?
he’s down there somewhere. let me take another look.
Posted by Blinding on November 14, 2008 at 9:28 am
No submissions from me. ;D Happy anniversary though, hope you have a good one.
Posted by D3T0N8R on November 14, 2008 at 9:33 am
“You don’t seem to want to accept the fact you’re dealing with an expert in guerrilla warfare, with a man who’s the best, with guns, with knives, with his bare hands. A man who’s been trained to ignore pain, ignore weather, to live off the land, to eat things that would make a billy goat puke! Or in this case a brute.”
Posted by retinence on November 14, 2008 at 9:36 am
15 shots of everclear, 8 car bombs, 31 cups of jungle juice, 5 unknown roofies, 12 games of full cup beer pong, 1 handle of tequila, and an entire lemon did not do this to Brutus. It was seeing the naked body of a Prophet that threw him over the edge.
Posted by retinence on November 14, 2008 at 9:40 am
Brute: “LEAVE ME ALONE, I’m eating dinner.”
Chief: “That’s no………… o.k. sure.”
Posted by Araknoros on November 14, 2008 at 9:59 am
timmy’s stomach just couldn’t take all the torture from the last night of his fraternity’s rush party.
1.drink
2.drink more
3.??????????
4.profit?
happy anniversary bs!!!
Posted by bs angel on November 14, 2008 at 10:06 am
(Thank you for the anniversary wishes!)
Posted by mendicantbias00 on November 14, 2008 at 10:15 am
Chief: Oh My God! I can’t believe you actually ATE that infection form…that was so worth the five bucks!
Brute: Shut the F *Vomits* uck Up!
Posted by AT-AT on November 14, 2008 at 10:37 am
I’m not gonna touch that picture, even with a 39 and half foot pole.
Posted by SonofMacPhisto on November 14, 2008 at 10:50 am
Fuck the Forerunners, you pray to THIS god now!
Posted by Ric Stone on November 14, 2008 at 10:50 am
Beer before liquor, never been sicker!!.
Posted by Matoro3311 on November 14, 2008 at 11:29 am
Say my name! Say it!
Posted by Matoro3311 on November 14, 2008 at 11:30 am
No, no!
Eat shit and die!
:P
Posted by SoxKid05 on November 14, 2008 at 11:30 am
‘holy architect, 58 shots and your still conscious?’
Posted by yayap_the_grunt on November 14, 2008 at 11:38 am
Brute: “So, where’s this magic leprechaun?”
Chief: “You have to look very closely. He’s very small.”
Brute: “Hmm… Ooooh…”
Chief: *lulz* “Just a bit closer…”
Brute: “I think I see him! Hai magic leprechaun! Can haz pot of goldz now plz k thnx lol?”
Chief: *lulz* “Not now matey! *shoves brutes head into toilet with butt of rifle* “LOL PWNT!” *runs away*
Brute: *head stuck in toilet* “Damn you chiefy!” *shakes fist* “I’ll get you next time!”
Posted by Queen 0f Blades on November 14, 2008 at 11:49 am
“I told you not to drink the water.”
Happy anniversary. :P
Posted by CrazedOne1988 on November 14, 2008 at 12:02 pm
“Dude, isn’t that the biggest turd you’ve ever seen?!?!?!”
Posted by TrAvaIs 6t6 on November 14, 2008 at 12:14 pm
The Chief has discovered the newest, greatest anti-noob weapon: The Swirly
Posted by Dust and Echoes on November 14, 2008 at 12:24 pm
Master Chief:What did we learn about taco bell?
Posted by Mercury on November 14, 2008 at 12:25 pm
Brute defecation was certainly not done the way the Chief expected.
or
After Hawty’s anniversary party, the place was a mess, the Chief was passed out in the back yard, several grunts had made off with the TV …but nothing prepared her for what the brutes had left for her in the bathroom.
Posted by Das Kalk on November 14, 2008 at 12:32 pm
The chief had warned his brute buddy about playing Mirror’s Edge.
Posted by Gangsterreus on November 14, 2008 at 12:39 pm
so, what did you say this achievement was called?
Posted by Waffle Deluxe on November 14, 2008 at 1:09 pm
Brutesy and the Chief learned something today, if you’re starving, eating out of the toilet is not a good alternative!
Posted by urk on November 14, 2008 at 1:23 pm
+2 Rads
Posted by Uglywimp on November 14, 2008 at 1:28 pm
The Master Chief introduces the Covenant one of the horrors of humanity: High School
Posted by Johnny Be Good on November 14, 2008 at 1:39 pm
…Deeper…
Posted by Rift on November 14, 2008 at 1:43 pm
“Dude… and I thought you were shit-faced before.”
————–
Happy Anniversary!
Posted by pittofdoom on November 14, 2008 at 1:52 pm
In an attempt to further study the anatomy of the Brutes, Master Chief discovered that they, much like owls, vomit their food back up, unlike most other life forms. He couldn’t concieve of what usefullness this information might hold, but it was certainly an interesting study.
Posted by Minty Fresh on November 14, 2008 at 1:53 pm
Chief was a really bully in school. That still hasn’t changed when it comes to brutes.
Posted by Tog Ig on November 14, 2008 at 2:05 pm
You said you just came in here and it was like this? Uh huh. Ya know being the best Brute Plumber doesn’t mean you Spartans can just start throwing sticky grenades down the toilet and expect me to fix it. Geez. It’s always “Brute Plumber fix my shower”, “Brute Plumber fix the sink” “Brute Plumber stop eating out of the toilet”
Posted by Tog Ig on November 14, 2008 at 2:18 pm
Spartan: “Heh heh….Bomb Dropped!!”
Posted by vshields ash on November 14, 2008 at 2:22 pm
what’s HE get out of it?????!!!!!!!!!
( please, god send ME a woman this dumb :)
ash
p.s. our 25th is feb. 4th :) good luck, keep em on a short leash :p
Posted by SonGoharotto on November 14, 2008 at 2:26 pm
Master Chief finally found out what the Forerunners look like when he caught a Brute praying to the porcelain god.
Posted by Blenniipus on November 14, 2008 at 3:34 pm
Master Chief: And that’s How you brush your teeth!
Posted by Blenniipus on November 14, 2008 at 3:36 pm
(Oh sorry didn’t notice it was the toilet)
Brute: Agggggghhhhhhh How do you humans eat this “Burger King”!!!!????!!!
Chief: Stop being a wuss!
Posted by RuneOfRed on November 14, 2008 at 3:36 pm
Brutes, much unlike you would think, can not hold down their Jagerbombers despite their physique.
Posted by Crunchbite on November 14, 2008 at 3:55 pm
*sniffs* Are you sure this is a chocolate fountain?
Posted by Surrender on November 14, 2008 at 4:16 pm
“How did he die?”
“Your contact? Not well.”
Posted by Piper Doig on November 14, 2008 at 4:21 pm
Happy Anniversary from the guys and “gal” over at Second Foundation!!!
Caption:
Even though he was about to hurl, our friend the Brute quickly thought twice about using a truckstop bathroom.
Posted by GMoneyChuck89 on November 14, 2008 at 4:48 pm
“Charlie! I told you that drinking a whole gallon of milk in ten seconds was bad for you. “
Posted by GMoneyChuck89 on November 14, 2008 at 4:49 pm
Unknown to human kind, Brutes relieve themselves out the other end.
Posted by NOKYARD on November 14, 2008 at 5:27 pm
Brute: “I can’t believe you just throw this stuff away, on our planet it is considered a delicacy”
or
Chief: “I assure you this IS the cafeteria, that IS meatloaf, and your desert is the big white mint in the fountain against that wall”
Happy Anniversary, from the been there, done that, have the scars to prove it crowd
Posted by J23 on November 14, 2008 at 6:06 pm
“THIS IS HOW YOU GET HEALTH IN FALLOUT 3!!!”
“GRAggh…maybe I’ll just rent it now that I think of it..”
Posted by newguy2445 on November 14, 2008 at 6:39 pm
John immediately regretted agreeing to show the Brute his face.
Posted by PikminGod on November 14, 2008 at 6:46 pm
“I’m never drinking again!”
Posted by RedDwarfian on November 14, 2008 at 7:13 pm
The ugly side of binging and purging.
Posted by phoenixfire360 on November 14, 2008 at 7:14 pm
brute:no one loves me!!!!!!!!*cry*
mc:no some1 loves u just not me..whispers to self”no wonder ur ugly wont stop drinking.”
Posted by gunstar2 on November 14, 2008 at 7:28 pm
“I told you not to drink the water in Voi, but nooooooooooo, you wouldn’t listen.”
Posted by Spade on November 14, 2008 at 7:56 pm
Chief: “How many times must I tell you, you can NOT defeat the leprechaun in a drinking contest!”
Posted by Spade on November 14, 2008 at 8:02 pm
Chief: “THATS IT! EITHER YOU GO TO THE NEXT AA MEETING OR YOU CAN GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!”
Posted by Spade on November 14, 2008 at 8:04 pm
Marine: “I’ve wondered why the brutes’ breath always smelled like crap.”
Posted by Sean C84 on November 14, 2008 at 9:31 pm
Dude… I don’t know what toilets are like on Brutonia, but the water in there’s not for drinking.
Posted by Bryan Ojeda on November 14, 2008 at 9:38 pm
“The Chief constantly reminded the brute to not eat at Taco Bell, but not listening to him lead to this brute’s ultimate demise”
Posted by Dusty Boy T on November 14, 2008 at 11:08 pm
After losing his job to a Grunt, Bruteson developed a serious drinking problem.
Posted by Trace on November 14, 2008 at 11:32 pm
Chief: “That’s right, monkey boy, you have to drink the whole thing.“
Posted by Trace on November 14, 2008 at 11:34 pm
“More sinkers than floaters.”
“Lay off the Jackal meat.”
Posted by Trace on November 14, 2008 at 11:36 pm
“Find Earth, done. Find Ark, done. Find Toilet: in progress“
Posted by Time Glitch on November 15, 2008 at 12:30 am
As the Chief casually strolled into the washroom at his favorite annual Celebrity dinner, he saw something his training couldn’t possibly have prepared him for. As the disgusting thing drooping over the sink continued to spew chunks of all manner of assorted things, an astonished Master Chief cried out:
“PARIS HILTON?!?”
Posted by the Light Show on November 15, 2008 at 5:28 am
“oh man, i just puked on an ant hill… cool”
Posted by Explar on November 15, 2008 at 11:12 am
Master Chief: “I told you it was over 9000 Courics!”
Posted by Desert Rat on November 15, 2008 at 11:26 am
“Is it a spider…….”
If anyone can figure the meaning of that, Internet cookies for you.
Happy Anniversary!
Posted by hk37 on November 15, 2008 at 11:43 am
Having been bullied when he was younger, the Chief took his anger out on his vanquished foes.
Posted by Gi85on on November 15, 2008 at 12:34 pm
“I guess that last French Martini was a bad idea after all!”
Posted by Whaappened? on November 15, 2008 at 3:06 pm
ew ew ew
Posted by humrh360 on November 15, 2008 at 6:40 pm
“NO! BAD CUJO!!”
Posted by Gnome on November 15, 2008 at 7:43 pm
“You got that there Diarea of the mouth”
Pre game lobby for the win >.>
“Well, this is still better than the food they serve in the mess hall.”
“Yep, thats a clog. Let me whip my snake out and get down on this bad boy.”
Posted by Tobias Grey on November 15, 2008 at 10:16 pm
The Brute, having never seen the movie, regretfully agreed to reinact the trailer house fight form Kill Bill Vol. 2 as the character Elle.
or
I promise, this is the human version of the food nipple. Go on try it!
Posted by The Last Hunter on November 15, 2008 at 11:32 pm
“I grow tired of games Mr Bond……”
And Happy Anniversary!
Posted by Admiral Madden on November 16, 2008 at 11:46 am
“Alas Poor Yorick, your skull IS in there.”
“Potty Training – your doing it wrong!”
“Fluffy the Brute is indeed, the only person who didn’t love the Poutine.”
Posted by fezgod on November 16, 2008 at 2:19 pm
Chief: Yeah that’s right boy, pick up the soap.
Posted by Fushiko on November 16, 2008 at 9:57 pm
Brute:”Man i just don’t see it..”
Cheif: “You can not look at that and tell me that doesn’t look like Sgt. Johnson….”
Posted by Aeros on November 17, 2008 at 10:38 am
“And I thought what they served us at Currahee was rough chow.”
Posted by NeedlerSandwich on November 17, 2008 at 2:30 pm
“Yup, it’s clogged. How many times have I told you not to toss your empty swords down there?”
Posted by tas9303 on November 17, 2008 at 5:09 pm
the worms the bitch isnt it
Posted by Trace on November 17, 2008 at 7:36 pm
“It’s not a spider!”
Come on, Desert Rat, pick a less obvious quote next time :P
Posted by Whaappened? on November 18, 2008 at 10:03 pm
The Covenant has their form of shock site, too-Brutse.cx-as this unlucky Jiralhanae discovered.