Friday Caption Fun, Round 11
June 6, 2008 498 Comments
Today we find ourselves at Friday yet again, which means it’s time to procrastinate until your weekend officially arrives. You are in luck because I have another hilariously amazing screenshot just waiting for your witty words. First up though is recapping last week’s captions. It was a lot of fun sifting through the nearly 300 submissions, and here are the ones that I found the most entertaining.
- Chief: “OMGZ BRUTE ARMOR PERMZ! THAT IZ BETTER THAN RECONZ!” (Durandal)
- “Curling up for a nap around the still-warm engine seemed like a good idea at the time.” (Mercutio2000)
- “Arbiter: I thought I had the shitty spawns..!” (Gangsterreus)
- “I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER!” (ZZoMBiE13)
- “O hai, i upgraded ur horsepowers!” (yayap_the_grunt)
- “Aliens: Making women drivers look good since 2525.” (Majick)
- “That’s what you get when you buy the cheap GPS.” (dan)
- “Arby realized too late that his new AI hood ornament’s personality was not very nice.” (frEkLz)
- “Once again, Jimmy the Head ruins a great picture.” (Voodoo Frost)
- “Shotgun, you’re doing it wrong.” (Sp4rki)
That shotgun line took me a while to figure out because I kept thinking of the weapon, not the position in the car. Oh, what playing too much Halo does to you! If you play too much Halo too, you’ll definitely get a kick out this week’s screenshot. My title for it is “I eat rocket”, but what is your witty caption?
Author: tingsoon
“Where do I put it?! WHERE DO I PUT IT?!”
om nom nom nom
(Only funny if you’ve seen the special episode of a certain machinima about a certain Spartan and his ex-condemned Elite pal)
After her katamari tampon bag riped, she found the next best thing.
The elite learns the hard way that the magician’s trick was just an illusion!
Thats a spicy meat-ball!
1-And you thought mandibles had no uses!
2-Elites tend to like their cigars large….very large………. and explosive.
No, Rover! NO FETCH!!!
OM NOM NOM NOM!!!
“EEERRRRRGHHHH!!!”
“Whatever you do… don’t bite down.”
After conquering the Peruvian Death Pepper, this elite decided to move on to decisively more spicy dishes…
^^^ Make that “decisively spicier”. (Man, I need to go to bed. >_<)
Fire eating: You’re doing it wrong…
(Related to my first caption)
As it turns out, the story of the dynamite fetching dog and sunken jeep wasn’t really an urban legend… more like a misrepresentation of the facts.
Source:
http://www.snopes.com/critters/cruelty/dynamite.asp
And they said i’d never get a rocket stick.
Shown here is the Gold Medalist’s snag in the first-ever Rocket Catching competition in the Interplanetary Olympics of 2584.
Sadly, this particular medal was awarded posthumously…
OMG! I has lightsaber.
@ Eruzen: C-C-C-Combo Breaker! And only by 13 seconds, to boot. Well played.
I’m out of ideas. For now…
This isn’t a caption, I’m just taking this time to publicly predict the amount of captions that will be entered as – “OM NOM NOM NOM”. Hmmm I’ll guess….at least 20? Yeah, that sounds about right. 20.
Shooting off at the mouth.
(Muffled)I caught something, what is-oh shi-
Strong dogs don’t fetch bones.
or:
Polly wanna cracker??
Here’s a picture of Half-Jaw’s cousin. After the, ah, rocket incident, we call him no-head.
Biting the Bullet: You’re doing it wrong
What? It’s not gay!
“I haz a rocketz!”
This is why split jaws are awesome!
The Arbiter has an explosive appetite!
The elite found new ways for quick transportation.
reason why elite population is low
Elite:Someone set up me the bomb!
Proof that the only reason people choose Elite armor is to show off. :-P
EAT THIS!
What to do when you run out of ammo.
All your bombs r belong to me
Once Elites joined the Humans in the war it took them a while to get use to Human sayings, such as ‘bite the bullet’ in this case.
-elites got attitude-
He has rockets and sniper? What a weapons whore.
…and I’ll just defuse this with my face…
Halo Wars, Episode IX: “Remnants of the Jedi”
117 > 1138
Hey! Look at what I found! (reference to Darkspire’s Matchmaking series)
OR
The morality of UNSC munitions testing is… questionable.
OR
Get your M41 SSR SPNKr tongue piercing TODAY!
OR
Is it a spider?!
~I~
Is it a spider?
“What do you think you’re doing Master Chief?!”
“Giving the elite his rocket back. Sir.”:
Looks like he bite the bullet!
This is more than even an elite can chew!
this one came to me by seeing BS angel’s avatar…
Mute it before you chew it
Elite’s last words: So you mean i’m not sucking on a grunt food nipple?
Hai guyz! I dun found this rocket!
Caboose: I call him, Crunchbite..!
Alright nobody move! Put all the money in the bag or else I’ll bite down really hard! Seriously, I’m not kidding I’ll do it!!
“Rocket. Its whats for dinner!”
Red, who never fully understood the concept of ‘sarcasm’ or ‘trash talk’, didn’t even give his enemy’s cry “Suck on this!” a second thought. He will be missed.
“Ich bin schnappie, das kleine krokodil”
(meaning: I am Schnappie, the little crocodile)
i dunno if this song ever made it to the USA, but there was a ±6 year old girl in Germany who wrote the following song:
That song took the number 1 spot on the German charts (yea,,, really….)
For the Great Journey!
Dear George Lucas, plz put me in ur next Star Wars movie I can hold a lightsabr wit ma teeth, see?
Silly Red, Rockets are for kids!
Introducing the Bungie’s new DLC, sausage armor permutations! Yummy!
Dammit Zannahee! Changing warthog tires is serious business! Either hold the flashlight the right way or get down here and help me!
I’m tha bomb!! literally
Announcer: “BOMB ARMED!”
This isn’t a caption, I’m just taking this time to publicly predict the amount of captions that will be entered as – “OM NOM NOM NOM”. Hmmm I’ll guess….at least 20? Yeah, that sounds about right. 20.
Hahaha, my thoughts exactly.
After witnessing such a sight, Blue team decided the fetal position was the best course of action for the rest of the game.
This particular Rambo sequel was deemed too far-fetched even for Hollywood.
1.You think YOU’RE tough?
2.I eat rockets for breakfast!
3.When I kiss her, she’ll feel the Earth move for sure!
“I got an idea for a movie: we’ll take Halo and combine it with Rambo and Star Wars… We’ll call it Raymbow Wars. It’ll be perfect!”
This will make that catching a bullet between your teeth trick seem safe.
When the elite found out that Recon was only for spartan character models….
Can Chuck Norris catch a rocket between HIS mandibles?! Wort wort wort!
Mmmm…… Spicy Tuna Roll
Elites have one extra rocket slot over spartans… they can have it
After a lifetime of practice, this Sangheili was finally able to catch a UNSC rocket in midflight. His dismembered head was found ten days later.
Grifball: the early days
‘Wow this is an explosion of flavour’
and
‘after years of research elites finally find a way to throw grenades without the need to stop firing’
and finnaly
‘Bungie attempt to make matchmaking more interesting, sudden death’
the first thing that came to mind is that he’s about to get a limb cut of and there isn’t any morphine (the rocket is a gag)
And you thought that Dave’s Ultimate Insanity Sauce was bad!
The new and improved Tijuana Mama
(some credit must be given to Pooberry for these, I think)
Holding my lightsaber in my mouth, TRIPLE WIELDING!
I think we need to improve on our design for an elite retainer….
My PRECIOUS… little stick of wondor…
I Iz in your worldz stealingz your rocketz
Tour Guide in 2008: “And over here we have this sculpture entitled The Insanity of War. Notice the ease with which we can project idiocy onto an alien race. However, I think there is a deeper meaning here: The Imperialism of Humanity.”
This is what happens when you play fetch with an elite.
Silly elite, the rocket goes in the Head not the mouth. Get it right so I can kill you next round.
Elite: To answer your question, about this big.
Stop playing with your food and eat it, young Sangheili!
SPNKR High-Explosive Missiles. It’s what’s for dinner.
OR
“I can’t BELIEVE Tim got a double no scope before I did! Oh, well, here goes….”
Also –
“I eat rockets for breakfast.”
“So?”
“Without any milk”
“!GASP!”
SPARTAN: Think fast!
ELITE: Hey! I thougt fast!…wait a minute BOOOM
and
False alarm, it’s a dud. See. BOOOM
and
If catching a rocket doesn’t get me recon armor, nothing will.
He doesn’t quite grasp the concept of the Jedi.
That doesn’t seem physically possible!
(you only get this if you saw the one with spartan with the gun in his crotch)
This is how elites give spartans blow jobs!
It was a little too late when he realised that the Casper reenactment scene wasn’t gonna go well.
Cheers :)
This is my BOOMSTICK!!!
or
After this display of bite strength, all of the other players decided to stop teabagging the red elite.
“Bungie decided, after the Halo 3 Beta, to take out the ‘Speed’ version of Assault.”
“After seeing the infamous ‘traffic cone suicide’, this Elite tried to do the same thing with a rocket. It didn’t work.”
“SPNKr Rockets: making dentists happy since 2341.”
“OM NOM NOM NOM”
“Red Team ran out of painkiller, so they had the Elite due for surgery bite the rocket, because they ran out of bullets too. The elite got a little more surgery than he bargained for.”
“OM NOM NOM NOM”
Anybody remember this classic scene?
http://www.adultswim.com/video/?episodeID=1cd03940e0b04e1a077a1ba39001e10f
“As it turns out, Molotov can catch more than knives with her teeth…”
Chief, aiming rocket at Elite
Chief: ‘Bet you can’t eat it”
Elite: ‘You’re on’
“I now haz mastered da force”
Silly elite, rockets are for kids.
Will you Nom the Rocket that Feeds You? Will the Elite drop to his knees?
this sausage tastes like gun power….. or a rocket
or
Thats a good boy now do it again
Guys, you said we were gonna play assault. This isn’t what i signed up for.
in the future, FEAR FACTOR is no longer about eating testicles and bathing in snakes . . .
Squiggles, the armless elite, would not be denied in his quest to be a Jedi.
Ah, here we go! i needed this ammo!
or
BAD ELITE!!! i threw a stick! NOT a rocket!!!
or
The new elite muzzle, for when they start gabbing on about the great journey a BIT to much.
Tastes like Chicken!
Ulma Tasosee vowed that he would never again allow a grunt to perform dentistry upon him…
1. “Famous last words: ‘No, seriously. I’ll put it in my mouth and you take the picture. It’ll be hilarious.”
2. “The game of catch has never been this fun!”
3. “It’s not a mint, its a Tic Tac.”
4. “Not pictured: ‘Splosion!”
Giving head… you’re doing it wrong
Cigar – you’re doing it wrong.
At long last I give you; THE NINTH GRENADE!
So we finally find out what happens to rockets when they are shot at Elites.
How the dinosaurs really died out
“Listerine, pure dynamite for the mouth.”
Unfortunately this is only fun in Sweden, I think, so I have to make a brief explanation. We have a liquid called “Listerine” to rinse one’s mouth width. The qoute is a translation of its commercial.
CHIEF!, GET ME THE SALT… FAST!
WOAH! Cocaine is an amazing drug, but WOAH.
Mmm…SPNKR rocket flying at a 100m/s…
Also: Could use a little salt..
How Elites deal with toothaches. :)
Lightsaber:
You’re doing it wrong.
“Unfortunately this is only fun in Sweden, I think, so I have to make a brief explanation. We have a liquid called “Listerine” to rinse one’s mouth width.”
We have that down under as well.
“Elites make greate pets, they fetch newspapers, flashlights, and can even fire military grade rocket launchers.”
“No fido, bad boy, i said newspaper, thats a rocket.”
Now this is a hardcore Red Jumpsuit Apparatus fan, “Will you sign my rocket?”
“What is it chompey? Did timmy fall down a well?”
“So your dog can ride a skateboard, mine can fetch a rocket!”
I LOVE reenacting my favorite movie: JAWS!!!
Smile you son of A…( Jaws)
“Wait… WAIT! I thought you say I had to eat a HOT DOG, not a steaming hot rocket… AHHH! I’m flyyyiiiiiinnnggggggggg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
my sausage tastes umm…….. er………. explosive :)
Good boy!
Usually you bite the pin and throw the grade but we’ll give you an F for eFfort.
DID I ACCIDENTLLY KILL MY MASTER ? WELL ANYWHO I LIKE MY ROCKETS TO BE JUICY
Tired of playing fetch with Fido’s bone, the Master Chief decided to amp things up a bit.
Rockets are made of cake?!
“BLARG?” Caboose: “Good Fluffy! I like apples too!” –reference to RVB
mmmm, lightsaber
what?… you dun like my mouth lightsaber??? :(
This was Timmy’s last game of fetch…
Hands… are… full… must… hold… baton… in… mouth…!!!!!!
I am Unstoppable!
or
I’m the Juggernaut *****!
This is why Elites hate Star Wars.
Do you know who I am? I’m THE JUGGERNAUT *****!
“Do I have something in my teeth?”
Nay,
Jedi are forbidden to love. Also, to have pets.
ROCKET, apply directly in the mouth!
ROCKET, apply directly in the mouth!
ROCKET, apply directly in the mouth!
How badly do you want Halo 4 Mr. Elite?
the young starting-out elite recruit finds that human beer has irrevocable effect on one’s judgement…
Got any floss? Mint flavored?
Dude, Stacy is comming over right now. Is there anything in my teeth?
*two elites places bets. third elite cathces a rocket*
elite 1: just lost 5 covenant bucks..
“Will catch rockets for recon!”
“OM-NOM-NOM-NOM!!!”
–THE ELITES LAST WORDS
Allah Allah MJ!!!!!!!!
What would YOU do for a Klondike bar?
“POWER THIRST–ROCKET EDITION!!”
“In sadder news: an elite was killed today after the introduction of Jimmy Dean’s new Explosive Sausage was swapped for an actual rocket…who would’ve guessed it’d actually BLOW HIS MIND!!”
“RAWRORGDOR: The ‘Splodinator”
Rockets are for Noobs…and I eat Noobs for breakfast.
Where’s the beef?
The Moment of Realization followed by a Feline-esque Whimper.
Wait, this isn’t steak…
Cheif talking to Cortana
“Sorry, but this is the only way we could get him to smile.”
Cortana
“Ahhh i see, so how do you plan to get it out?”
Chief
” i dunno and dont care”.
then the elite realized the secret of the force and stated in a garbled manor, “who needs hands! I wield my light saber mandible style!”
Hardcore Elite Blowjob!!! Join http://www.hardcoreelites.com NOW to see all hardcore Elite pics.
Chief
“Fetch!”
Arby
“*Roof*”
Cheif
” Good boy, Now drop it.”
KA BOOM!!!!!
Chief: This is only going to hurt a little (pulls needs from elites backside)
And here we have it folks, Chuck Norris if he ever was an alien.
No, you dumb Elite! You pull grenade pins with your mouth, not rocket shells!!!!
“Hey guys, watch me crush this Pringles can with my mouth!”
“Russian Roulette, Elite style.”
silly elite…rockets are for kids
or
you dropped this!
Explodes in your mouth, not in you hands…
..
If you tried it only once, does that still mean you’re gay?
..
One time, at band camp…
..
Haven’t you ever just wondered what one tastes like? Ever?
..
I love the smell of SPNKR in the morning..
..
So this is what it means to “turn it up to 11″….
1.5 seconds after finally mastering the martial art of missile biting, this poor soul realized why it had very nearly become a lost art.
“Beautiful Catch! Lets see what the judges have to say.. When Extreme Fetching returns!”
“I saw Wiley Coyote do it and thought maybe, just maybe, i could do it too.”
New Ultra Elite Mega High Protein Bars! All the explosive nitrogen based chemical components you need, to have an extreme work out!
Also in this limited offer Preorder now and receive a free part of our excludisive plasma grenade dieting pills absolutely free!
Finally I get a decent spawaaahhhhhhhrrBOOM
Got a light? Oops, I lit the wrong end.
om nom… HOT rocket, HOT!
Some dogs chase frisbies. Some chase sticks. Some, tennis balls. This one, however, well, let’s just say he’s a bit faster then the average.
This is harder than I’m used to, but I’m down…
What would you do for a Klondike Bar?
The new improoved heat seeking rocket in action. Trackinng signal in progress…
Everything seems normal…wait there apears to be a problem. It’s speed has decreased by 50%!
What could cause that?
Initiating on board camera….WTF?!!!!!
When asked later, this elite admitted that the mouth was not the best place for the booster to mars.
“Because it’s too late to apologiiiiiize, it’s too laaaaaaaaaaate……..”
“Good boy, good fetch, now drop it BEFORE YOUR HEAD EXPLODES”
“It is the year 2525 and we have finally perfected long distance transportation”
“Transportation unit test #231:
Subject: elite#1137
Result: FAILURE
Cause: rapid acceleration into a wall then a large explosion
Notes: Somebody order some new test subjects”
“Dude, get your @$$ back down range”
“His names Elite0 hes like a samari”
“im practicing for something private, see me and my brute buddy are goin out later and well YA KNOW WHAT THEY SAY BOUT APES WITH BIG FEET”
hes going to oraly return to sender
“Why the HELL didn’t you tell you had a bomb in your mouth?!”
Tastes like chicken.
I wonder what will happen whi\en I squeeze…
Some people prefer TicTacs to make their breath nice and minty fresh. The Arbiter prefers something more of the explosive variety.
or
“Hey! This isn’t what I ordered!”
or
Meet the new crew of Jackass. No longer will they use [i]Little[/i] Red Rockets and Ice Horses.
“I’m a different kind of suicide bomber!”
EPIC FAIL!
BITE THE BULLET (or not),……….(please dont)
This isnt meow mix!
Oh, this thing goes in the other end…..
After losing his rocket launcher, the elite tried a new way of using those leftover rockets.
The secret to TRIPLE wielding.
Boom! Headshot!
“So THESE are the rocks and sticks Sergeant Johnson used in them olden’ days. Not too shabby.”
Hitbox? I don’t need no stinkin’ hitbox!
I swear those freaking Elites are broken. OMG Bungie! Plz fix!
Maglite. Lighting the way to victory even when your hands are full.
Remember me…as a hero!
beat THAT obi-wan! bet ya cant hold a lightsaber with your TEETH!
It’s like a rocket in my mouth!, and everyone’s invi… oh wait..oh no… …
What would YOU do for a Klondike Bar?
“Triple kill, Overkill, Tastetacular”
Little did the Elite Know, The RoflCopter Could Shoot LMAORockets
DROP IT! DROOOOOP IIIIITTTT! (smacks with newspaper)
What? Is there something on my face?
Its not what it looks like!
or
He just had a bad habit of sucking on long, hard, explosive objects…
or
Hm… small hint of lime, a little bit of pepper, ITS PERFECT!
I’m in ur amm0 box, eating ur roketz.
Its alright ill ge that sniper shot out of your back, just bite the bullet or dynamite…
y does everything always end up in my mouth
“Didn’t you read the Label? Point toward Enemy!”
Elites like to lather up their magic bullets.
2.look mom no hands
3.look elites can fetch too
Neo: (from the matrix) Damn even I wouldn’t try that.
“Welcome to David Blaine: Street Magic.”
Fail…
someone is going to have some explosive diareha
1. UR DOIN IT WRONG. (I had to, I’m sorry -.-)
2. Rocket-flakes they’re more than gooood, they’re GREEEAAAT!
3. Cheap dental work. Please sign this release form.
4. Hot Rockets! (Like Hot Pockets… yeah…)
5. The cake is a lie. A very explosive, painful lie.
I’ll stop before I kill someone with my terrible humor. I like Chaelek’s best so far.
They thought I didn’t understand the game of “fetch”.
blarg
“Meet the the Cat. 009 Jedi Class Elite. Fully equipped with rockets and a magnum in hand, a sniper on back (just in case), and a lightsaber gripped tightly by mandibles.”
1. And people wonder why dinosaurs went extinct.
2. Ace Ventura’s got nothing on the Elites.
Did you lose this?
Number 231 on the list of “Things Not To Put In Your Mouth.”
Sometimes when your teammate takes the banshee, you just got to find a way to the other side…
“Those human magicians are pussies, they can only catch a bullet in their teeth, I can caught myself a rocket,” Arby
1 – This isn’t a pickle, they always get my order wrong.
2 – Alright, Hot Pockets!
master cheif’s idea of covenant dentistry
This will be a mind-blowing experience…
Things didn’t go too well when Crunchbite met Andy’s cousin. – RvB
no… bad dog! drop it… drop it… no don’t come closer.!!.. drop it!
its exactly what it looks like
…the kids at school would ridicule little Johnny for his ridiculous looking retainer…this sadly led to his suicide
“Futuristic pacifier. WARNING: may cause loss of limb.”
Don’t tell my dentist
After years of field testing with sausages, the Sangheli had finally been conditioned to fetch anything.
After the doctor told him he only had 24 hours to live, Bob decided to try something he had wanted to try his whole life…
Mm Mm Mm..Toasty
My husband bought this for me to suck on.
The Great Journey begins.
“rockets are a good source of iron!”
The biggest diss, like catching that kids snowball in elementary school and throwing it back at him, Halo style!
“oh Crap.”
And you think flossing your teeth is bad.
“$5 foot-long”
mister McSmithy’s idea of a “practical” harmonica
If Chuck Norris could stop it like this, so could I.
does this gives me dees caviteez?
dude i was so going to use the om nom nom one!! anyways…
“alright light up the bottle rocket! Wait, you WHAT?? OH SH-”
chiggity check yo self b4 U WRECK YO SELF
U JUST BEEN T E R M I N A T E D
(Announcer Voice) New Rocketabs. Cures any disease. Side effects may include Headache, Vomiting and Explosive Diarrhea (Death is not a side effect… its um…. more of a certainty).
Tastes like chicken!
The rising price of gas forced Dan to find new modes of travel
apparently you can teach a dino to play fetch
Aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?
two words sum it all up: Dental Bill
Penn and Teller ain’t got nothing on this.
“Mag-lite, it’s never dark in America”
after joey saw the human cannonball, he decided to try himself but decided to add more of a bang
Now be honest. Is there something in my teeth. Why won’t you look at me? Where are you going? Why are you running away…..?!!
Oh great, look what the Elite dragged in…
or…
Okay guys, the bad news is I have a rocket jammed in my mandibles, but the good news is I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico!
“Tastes Like Chicken!”
BITE THE BULLET (rocket)
“Kiss Me Im Alien”
uh oh….hail fore runners full of grace, the flood is with you…
This taste so much better than a t-bag to the face
If I don’t get reconz, I swear I’ll blow up the internetz!
Hahaha! Now I Have Y-Guh-Wuffdafugg!?!?! *BOOM*
OR
Diff Yew Droff thish sir?
Rockets. Making fetch more fun for everybody.
Pop ROCKetS….Never mix with an Elite.
Those new pretzal sticks we bought sure do have an explosive kick
What freaked the Spartan out the most was not how the Elite had managed to catch the rocket, but rather what it did with the rocket afterwards
((WTF, I would like to know how that was pulled off!!))
1) Master Cheif used to be quite cruel on how he used to deal with the elites.
2) After numerous failed attempts on the sniper, the noob as finally resorts to jihad! XD
3) The reason why the prophets replaced the Sangheli.
4) The newest recruit’s diet of the proud Sangheli has many worrisome about his next bowel movement.
When suicide grunts flailing with plasma grenades are not enough…SUICIDE ELITES!!!
Iz ther sumfin in ma teef?
No Sparky put that rocket back where you found it.
Bad Elite! Bad!
The stunt was working so well until he sneezed.
Master Chief… I am your father….
hey look what i found!!! “betrayal”
I hate it when they make me do that scene from predator! why did he have to kill himself…??
“Now time for my altimate sith teqniqe, THE TRI-SABER SLASH”
“hey, I brought this back for you!”
Rocket? I thought you said “baguette”.
“I GOTS A LIGHTSABER IN MA MOUTH!”
TASTES LIKE PAIN!
if Spartans get Katanas…
New Lays Chips “Rocket Flavor:Special Edition”
Betcha’ can eat ONLY one…
player: “when i told you to suck it that’s not what i was implying…”
So much for all the money his parents spent on braces
Hay! This r not cheezburger!
“No dude, its totally safe all the cool kids are doing it.”
“Dun, dun. Dun, dun. Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun! Quick! Shoot the damn thing!!!”
“Easier than takin’ Ol’ Fido out back, plus much more fun.”
“What?! It was the 4th of July?! Where’s your patriotism?!”
When an elite gets hungry…
If you think it’s hot now, wait ’til it comes out the back end.
This year’s interspiecies dentist symposium revealed new suprising techniques.
Win
“Do I leave it in or take it out?! Do I leave it in or take it out?!”
erm… guys? this isnt Team SWAT anymore is it……
It’s supposed to cause birth defects, but what the heck they’re gonna be ugly anyway
I bring extra ammo guys!
1. Achmed the dead terrorist before his incident…
2. Alright, which one of you kids threw this?
3. He caught the first one, but he forgot that rockets come in pairs!
4. elite, “Will this hurt doc?”
spartan dentist, “Don’t worry kid, after the first bite you won’t feel a thing.”
5. Dad i don’t want to play catch anymo… *BOOM*
If hungry, eat rocket.
There have to be easier ways to get around the map……
Open mindedness… The final downfall of the Elite race.
that lagging cheater finally got what was coming to him!
That would have made a great story to tell his kids one day if he would have just threw it back.
Master Chief would still rather no-scope the elite.
“Is there something in my teeth?”
Enemy team member:
“He’s got a rocket launcher and a snip… He has a lightsaber in his mouth! Somebody take this guy out!”
“Why is everybody running away?”
or
“This salami is very, very hot”
or
“This new sport is going to blow some minds!”
Elite learns the joys of braces.
With Frankie gone some Halo characters experienced suicidal tendencies.
or
After being kicked out of the covenant, some Elites developed extreme depression.
thats all you’ll get from me. Tugboats, arson and suicide jokes XD
“om nom nom nom” tally: 4
That can’t be right.
Sarge: “So… It was HOW big?”
Elite: “Blarg Blarg Honk Honk?”
Church: “Bow chica bow wow”
Rocket.. Once you pop, you can’t stop.
Rocket.. Bet you can’t eat just one.
Master Chief: ARBY! If you were THAT hungry we could’ve stopped at Mc D’s!
NO! STOP SINGING THAT F@&%ING SONG! WE ARE NOT HAVING CHICKEN TONIGHT!
The Saying “Bit off more than he could chew” comes to mind.
thats not a bone ur chewing on
“Dont worry, I’ll just respawn…”
Frankie’s last words while playing Rockets Elimination.
Well there’s no mongoose on The Pit, so this elite got a brilliant idea.
“That can’t be right.”
Actually I’m surprised its so low.
Sadly, few Elites survived the intense mating rituals, as showing off for the female Elites involved holding a live rocket between their teeth until it exploded. Also unfortunate for the Elites, blowing themselves up doesn’t involve heaven and a bunch of virgins.
As Wort the Elite pondered his last, his mind inadvertently wandered to the fact that he left the oven on…
Its better in the attic than the basement….I suppose.
Halo 3 update 2.0.
Fixes.
Muting players is now 117 times more awesome.
1. He just couldn’t resist an A1 covered rocket. A1 steak sauce, yeah it’s that important.
2. The hibachi chef decided that tossing shrimp into patrons mouths’ just wasn’t interesting enough anymore.
Subway – Eat Fresh ;D
YOU SEE WHAT YOU GET?! YOU SEE WHAT YOU GET WHEN U MESS WITH THE WARRIOR!!!!?
After this incident, Bungie decided that unlimited ammo was the way to go in rocket matches, as aquiring ammo in the field can be. . . hazardous. . .
Covenant flight technology: the early stages.
I can’t believe its not butter!
its all fun in games unlit some one is stupid enough to eat a rocket
Before he knew it, The Elite never realised that what he had in his jaws was not a simple flare used to illuminate a cavern.
General, We are sad to report that the new style of jet-pack you asked for needs further testing and will not be available for a fall release.
The giant yellow mouth-wielded lightsabre was proof that George Lucas had finally run out of ideas.
Narrator: ” Here we have an elite discovering the human concept of ‘fast food’……next he will discover a massive case of ‘heart burn’”
Penn and Teller got nothin’ on this guy.
“Hey guys i GOTS THE FLAG! A ticking one!….Thats good right?”
orrr
Elite: “I’ve had bigger”
Chuck Norris as an Elite….
Marcus, the circus elite would soon regret his new, daring stunt.
Om nom *BLAM*
After the horrifying event, “rocket fetching” was made illegal, and was never to be performed again by pet elite owners.
I caught a rocket, I caught a rocket, I caught a rocket, HEY HEY HE…OH CRAP
……”He’s gotta be the host!”……..
The infamous stupidity of Mike would soon come to an end, as an unknown spartan enemy fired his rocket, after telling him to “Eat this”.
Playing Fetch, Your doin it wrong!!
+
Fud, your doin it wrong!
+
Bungie finally gave the Elites something for 1000/1000 gamerscore: the ability to eat rockets!
Fail.
Does this count as “biting the bullet”?
The Elite realized far to late that his in-born tendency to grab things flying by his head was really not as useful as it once was…
Apparently he had never thought to use a string around a door knob, but darned if his ‘new method’ got the tooth out.
With a Rocket launcher in one hand, a Sniper Rifle on his back, and a Jedi Lightsaber in his teeth, there’s just no telling his next method of attack. Master Jedi Sniper Rocketeer Man!!
1.Elite: See Master Chief you owe me 5 bucks… Master Chief?…BOOM!
2.Micheal Jackson: And they said I was fucked up.
3.Elite 20 years later looking at photo: Thats the last time I take weed.
4.Elite: Stupid Genie when I asked for a big rocket for the ladies I didn’t mean this.
Want to see what else i can fit in my mouth?
You think this is bad? Just wait until it comes out the other end.
Man I love cuban cigars!
“How’s 50 pounds of TUNGSTEN strike yah?!”
“Actually, it’s a bit hot…”
>NEXT
“The next generation of suicide deathes from the grave. We’ve now moved from sticking your foot… to grabbing a live rocket in your teeth, and running at somebody. Recommended when more than 1 enemy is around.”
>NEXT
“Hey, you… over there… I’ve got some weapons… A sniper, a rocket launcher… and a rocket…”
EXpl0sion!
Man, master chief lied to me. These braces are never going to fix my overbite.
Obi Wans pet Elite scampers back after some ‘lightsabre fetch’!
the lightsaber, a more civilized weapon for a more civilized time period
Wort wort BOOM!
Rockets – The breakfast of champions!
“I love the taste of Napalm in the morning!”
…it will only hurt once…but damn will it hurt!
wow. that wuz quite a mouthfull. but i gess ur used 2 tht by naow. lololololololololololol
Elite, “Do I has sumthing in meh teef?”
“There was much controversy about holdings the Olympics in Pakistan, especially after the preliminary rounds.”
“I eat Iron Man for breakfast”
Popping your shoulder back is going to be pretty painfull Arby, here bite down on this.. **hee hee**
Ever wanted your stomach enlarged sigificantly? This is how to do it.
(Warning: May cause death-by-explosion-related-burns)
Oh what? There’s something on my face?
And Bruce Lee only caught a bullet, not a rocket!
LOOK WHAT I FOUND!!!!-Blam-!!
Explosive hot dog eating contest!
1. Now we know why elite have those splits in thier mouths.
2. And people ask why its hard to head shot elites in swat.
3. Smoking Kills.
This new variant for carrying the bomb doesn’t seem so fun when you’rethe bomb carrier…
OMG OMG OMG I DID IT!!!
…I Can Haz Recon?
Mmmmmmmm……. Highly Explosive Rockets….
Bite the bullet!
-What are you trying to tell me? That I can dodge bullets?
-No, Neo. I’m trying to tell you that when you’re ready, you won’t have to.
This isn’t what my gay friend told me it will taste like.
I can haz chee OMG DAS NO CHEEZBURGER!
Happy Birthday! We got you an elite cake! Blow out the candle!
…”Look Ma! No Ha…BOOM!”
Elite ~ “Master Chief… I am your father…”
MC ~ “No your not….”
Elite ~ “Yeah… i know…….”
…”Got Rocket?”…
Tango, anyone?
Taught to fetch at a young age, sadly the poor dog’s training took over at the worst possible time.
Am I in the Clan yet?!!??
Ever have one of those days where you knew you should have stayed in bed?
“Here bite down on this, it will lessen the pain of a terrible Rocket-Snipe FFA Custom game some ass-clown thought up and invited you to…Ouch.”
That’s a good bo…NOO!!! TAKE IT BACK!! TAKE IT BACK!!!
1. Armed to the teeth
2. Ratho’Suramee finally carried out his threat, the school bullies cowered in his prescence from that day.
“hey guys! guys! i told you i’d catch it!”
You will never be a Jedi Knight so put that light saber down!
I am never going to be the pitcher in rocket baseball again!
‘Hey! I told you he can fetch!’
Floss, beacause YOU need it
“WORT!”
Sword swallowing is boring. Try lightsabre swallowing.
Damn… he caught that too, what else is there to throw at him?
Rover! Fetch me my Boom Stick! Wrong Boom Stick, Rover…
After the oil depletion, many people resorted to more…drastic measures to get to work.
Luke…I am your father…
“Explosion immenant!” -Cortana, “Wait..! I got an Idea..” -Elite
“Is it…is it in yet?”
if at first you dont succeed, picking rockets up with your mouth isn’t for you.
“Hot Potato! Hot Potato! Hot Potato!”
And now, for one night only…
“… and this brave, honorable soldier sacrificed himself to save his friends by putting himself infront of an oncomming enemy projectile… unfortunatley, it just dragged him along with it and his friends were still killed. But i believe this warrior deserves a medal!
clearly this elite was on the toilet when god gave out commen sense
Elite: This is gonna give me some serious heart burn, chief get me the tums!!!
Elites are like little children: if they find a shinny object, they can’t help but put it in their mouth.
Marine: “Sir, all efforts to halt Godzilla have ended in failure!”
Grunt: “Run! It Godzillaaaaa!”
“I’ve seen a lot of ‘shoped photos in my day and you can tell by the pixels that it’s ‘shoped”
or
“Rockets, the breakfast of champions”
The Sangheili version of a bomb disposal squad, unfortunately the life expectancy of any member is approximately one mission.
Lumpy should’ve used this…
(Happy Tree Friends)
Hey Mom look what i got. Can i keep it PLEASE!
B3H0LD 0ur N3w s3cr3t w34p0n!!111! 3L1IT3 R0CK3T SC1ENT1STS!!!!
They call me Neo…
Now how long must i do this to get recon?
Jedi are friends, NOT food.
“One begs the question: If he has the rockets, how the hell did this happen?!”
It’s not gay if the balls don’t touch.
“Hey Billy, bet ya $5 that ya can’t catch this?” “You’re on! Okay, I’m ready! Ha! Caught it! Where’s my 5 bucks! Guys?”
finish th fight… are you man enough?
That’s one piss poor dental plan you got there!
sorry for two posts but thought of some more
you know when youve been halod (tango micy take)
2. have you seen my baseball…
(angry dog) fetch this feth that.. fetch this mo fo!
Pathetic Noob.. u cannot defeat travis with your wide-barrelled explosive crossbow!
You thought explosive diarrhea was bad….
Elite in a mumbled voice: “I told you I could fit the whole thing in my mouth!!”
Second Elite in the the distance: “That’s what she said!!”
Betcha you can’t do it again!
*whistle* come on lassie *whistle* fetch boy….good boy….hey what the hell?!
for the last time you stupid dog…..this is NOT how you play fetch!!
DOG(RED ELITE): *oh shit….*
Thats the last time we play fetch fido, you always bring it back before it blows! *Shakes Head* How is an owner supposed to blow up their pet if he’s always bringing the bombs back home???
No boy, spit it out! drop it! now!
Rockets – suck one.
How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsiepop? lets find out…
Interception!
This is even better than the brochoure!
The solution to pricey airplane tickets
So that’s how Elites got those split lips…..
Aaaw you know he dead. [commentary by chris tucker]
I used a grenade and it spun the rocket out of control… then, i ran towards it hoping to get a suicide vid, but instead got an awesome screenshot. If you want to know how to do it consistantly look at the video called ROK on my fileshare…
-Tingsoon
edit: the video is called Easy as pie!!!
Dis flaming twinky haz flavur, but it r not kakes.
“Something tells me I’m going to need an Alka Seltzer”
Beat that Neo
Soon after realizing that what he had bit down on was NOT in fact a passing bug, Don the Elite began to contemplate wheather he should spit OUT the large, burning, metal tube in his mouth. Or (since he was so very hungry), attempt to swollow it whole.
Or
The crazed, futuristic event we’ve all come to know and love: “Rocket Fetch”
“He ain’t gonna be in Rush Hour 4″
Damn it, why do I always fall for the fetch thing?
I’m on a never ending quest to find the ultimate jaw breaker.
Do I got something stuck in my teeth?
“Lets just say this will end with a bang”
Am I allowed 2? O well
“This allways happens when I eat the worm”
3 why thank you.
“Sometimes you just got to say: What the fudge”(Scrubs)
No, no, no, the expression is “Bite the BULLET”.
The reason Mythic difficulty was removed before shipping.
or
The blue elite finds out what makes the Arbiters super hot chili so spicy.
or
“Jackass” Halo 3 style! “The Rocket Chew!”
“OK, now what?”
…
“Hello Chief, are you there?”
OR
“The things I do to get on Bungie favourites”
“The Grunts have their double plasma grenade suicide, the Elites…”
This looks Shopped. I can tell from the pixels and from having seen quite a few Shops in my time.
“I learnt this from Ace Ventura!”
Suck it mythbusters
all your rocket are belong to me!
1) New 1 a month vitamamin tablets!
2) In desperation, the Covenant create a new group of Terrorist Elites…
“The Elite suddenly regretted being a Fixodent tester.”
“And so the saying was born, ‘Look before you eat.’”
“Envious of Criss Angel: Yes. As smart: No.”
“Rockets – Knocks out bad breath”
“The Elite knew it would hurt more coming out, than going in.”
“HMO Dental Care: It will only hurt the first time”
1-I knew the Arbiter was bad with a missile pod but this is ridiculous!
2-When the covenant realised they were losing the war they resorted to more… primitive tactics.
3-The prophets will be done!
Bomb a’pitite
And our next bachelor really enjoys big explosions and getting caught in bad situations.
Red(neck) Elites last words: Hey y’all, watch this!!!!!!!!
Elite: Still beats Listerine
Elite “Let’s see Chuck Norris do this!”
This is why we have to then nine Asian gods for pepto-bismol
or
Can u imagine pooting this?!
Whaths thith wakket doig id my mowth?
Elites- the disposable rocket stopper (results may vary)
Spit or swallow, the ultimate decision.
or
What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas!
or
David Letterman wants you for the next “Stupid Pet Tricks” show.
“…Don’t need a rocket launcher to own…” – Of course not “Dual Wielding my SMG” guy, you just need a rocket and an Elite to own.
“Do not attempt this trick at home Elites and Spartans, watch as I, The AMAZING ARBY, catch a rocket in my teeth!” – Arby
(Shit I forgot these exploded) – Arby AFTER the rocket has entered his mouth
“its not that big now let me see if i can fit your nades in too”
To the people who say it’s shopped: This is “Caption the Picture”, not “judge whether or not it’s shopped.”
Just slowly turn your head and let it go at that green base ^_^
charlie, he’s just kidding. its a reference to bungie a couple months back. and its not shopped, its on my fileshare if you want it…
The future generation of Jar Jar Binks
and so he learned the importance of taking beano before.
Elite dental plan: not so good actually.
To tingsoon: No I don’t doubt that it is or nothin’ like that, I just get sick of seeing stuff that isn’t relevant to the point of something. Sort of hypocritical my typing a message to you now, but whatever. The point is, if it’s you’re caption, that’s fine, but if it’s not, why post it? If it is and I’ve made a mistake I’m sorry. I’ma go kick myself for posting this.
“The only thing going through the elite’s head, besides an explosive missile that is, was, Don’t bite down, don’t bite down, don’t…Oh GOD!” You know what comes next…
I swear mom i didn’t take the last rocket from the jar.
Hey doc is this under the Mythic plan or not.
Bark! Bark!…Oh ****…
What? Is there something in my teeth?
or
Never play fetch with an Elite.
Actual Printing On Sangheili Standard-Issue Rocket: Insert In Mouth, Bite The Dust
Since When Did Elites Join Osama?
The force is not so strong with this one.
Elite: “ONE Chubby Bunny!”
Bungie finally figured out a way for people to stop asking for recon
What do you mean it’s not a fake?
Missles: An easy way to fly.
The Elites, not to be outdone, prepare retaliation for the Brute’s spitball prank
Friends don’t let friends do rockets
“Bungie u r retard — fix ur rockets”
OR
“This new rocket launcher is great, but the reloads are a BITCH!”
“I said hand me the sprocket, the SPROCKET!!”
“Yeah, yeah, I SEE it; we’ll fix it in the next Beta build.”
“After losing both arms in a fight, this Sangheili Jedi has mastered handling the Lightsaber with its mouth”
“Who said i was out of rocket ammo?”
” After failing to get his teeth the brilliant white he desired, the elite decided to try something different.”
Last time I go out drinking with Johnson.
Or…
Remember the time you got $hit-faced drunk and tried to catch that rocket? Yeah… I still got the picture.
Elite: I eat rockets for breakfast….
Spartan: Pft….so?
Elite: Without any milk……
Spartan:*epic gasp*