Friday Caption Fun, Round 10
May 30, 2008 291 Comments
It’s Friday, which means it’s time to slap some silly captions on a random screenshot. First we need to recap last week’s submissions though. Louis Wu said, “I’m guessing the comments section for this one will be pretty R-rated by the time it’s done…” and I am determined to prove him wrong. Some were dirty, a few were downright disgusting, but most of them were fairly tame. Here are my favorites from the clean enough to post pile.
- “After Red passed out from too many brewski’s on the same night he left his new digital camera lying on the floor next to him – Blue knew exactly what he had to do: embarrass his friend on the internet.” (-S-)
- “Mother was CQB, father was part Rogue, part Hayabusa. Their kid had one awful armor perm..” (petetheduck)
- “And this is how Halo Humpdays came to be.” (bvl)
- “The beginnings of purple team.” (BlueAzure)
- “When blue saw red choking on a peanut, he decided that this was just too humiliating of a way to die. So he gave him the heimlich maneuver and made it that much worse.” (A Pharmacist)
- “Sadly this was how red learned the importance of checking your six.” (awesome-o)
- “It was an effort but the Blue managed to stop the Red from jumping to his death after he discovered he had been put on the: ‘Will never have Recon’ list.” (aussie_spartan)
- “Luke says goodbye to Frankie, Halo style.” (Mercutio2000)
Those were fairly clean, yes? If you want to see the dirtier ones, you’ll have to scroll through all 127 comments yourself. Before you race off to do that, why don’t you stick around and caption this week’s screenshot first? I call it “Hood Bling” but what is your witty caption for it?
Author: Shadow 13th
Chief to Arbiter: What do you mean you only bought Flood insurance???
“Dammit Arby, this is meant to be a Hella Goulish Nightmare-Mobile. One Brute head isn’t enough.”
After running out of ammo, the Brutes started policing their dead, and after they ran of of policed ammo…they….umm….began to look for other alternatives.
The new warthog with flamegrill so you can cook while on the go. Perfect for all time favorites like Grunt legs or Bruteheads!
Fiyah, Fiyah, Fiyah!!
Surprise attack, your doing it wrong.
After the Jiralhanae lost the war, the Sangheili decided to exact punishment by forcing them to power the human vehicles. The Jiralhanae were not happy about this and complained constantly.
“Dammit Chief, what’d you do this time? Look just get out and check under the hood so we can figure out what’s making that soun-*crash* AHHHH AHHHHHHHHH”
“Granted the brute head addition does look hella cool, it’s just not very practical for driving…”
With the new Warthog permutations Bungie no longer had to cope with just the I can haz reconz but also the I can haz brutzhaed?
Curling up for a nap around the still-warm engine seemed like a good idea at the time.
As the mechanic looks under the hood:
“Well there’s your problem.”
Mercutio2000 FTW!
the new Brutehead Blower is guaranteed to give you at least 150 Horsepower!
Some people stick their heads through violins.
This Brute took it to another level, and stuck his head through a car.
Arbiter: “Hey! I haven’t finished paying off this yet!”
1. “I told him to wear a seatbelt.”
2. “Heeeeeeeeeeeere’s BRUTE!”
3. “Proof that warthogs are harder to drive while your the Arbitor.”
4. “I swear officer I didn’t mean to hit him! He just jumped out of nowhere!”
Wow! That was one big seagull!
Time travelling disadvantage #1…
Stuck, in a different way
That´s the coolest hoodblower i´ve ever seen..!
Arbiter: I thought I had the shitty spawns..!
1 – I can see the headlines now: “Warthog’s secrets revealed: Engine turns out to be compacted Brute!”
2 – Chief, I think I hit a deer…
3 – OMG, Black Mesa and their damn teleporters!
Brute: I think I swallowed a bug..
Brute: SONUVA BITCH!!
“All right! This brute head adds +3 to our Intimidation skill.” <- DnD reference. :)
Another fun way to use the Forge®
“…oh, speed-bump… So did anyone see the game this weekend?”
Everyone tried to ignore the screaming Brute as they drove to work that particular morning.
arbiter “roadkill”
Chief “Brutal roadkill!”
a noobish new overpowerd weapon, high pitched screams of agony in the morning, my new shirt drenched in blood, arby as the driver and my warthog’s windshield bashed to peices with the head of a monkey.
jup, this must be monday.
No, I swear I didn’t buy this bobble head.
“Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhrrrrrrr ::deep breath:: aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh……”
Mechanic looks under the hood:
“Well here’s your problem.”
For Halloween, the Arbiter and his crew decided on a ‘FireFly’ theme and dressed up as Reavers. Sadly, they couldn’t find a fake skull to put on their hog, so they used Jack instead.
I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER!
“O hai, i upgraded ur horsepowers!”
When hamsters aren’t good enough….
Possible candidate for ‘Pimp My Ride’
This morning, when this particular Brute soldier awoke, he didn’t know that he would not only be run by a seven foot tall man wearing armor and his octopus-faced friend, but that his expression would be captured by security cameras, and entertain children for many years.
“I swear, this isn’t what it looks like!”
~I~
yayap_the_grunt: hilarious
Hood ornament – the best use for Jiralhinae, live or dead.
You should see my Mongoose!
The beginnings of the char broiled brute burger.
here’s JOHNY!
Chief: How the heck did you repair the engine?
Arbie: I used a brute corpse to make a new one.
Chief: oh okay… wha WHAT!?
Soulofaqua (12:22:27) :
Chief: How the heck did you repair the engine?
Arbie: I used a brute corpse to make a new one.
Chief: oh okay… wha WHAT!?
Pure Awesome
After many years of thinking, Warthog designers finally came up with the squidgy Brute Bobblehead, perfect for when drivers are REALLY stressed…
Master Chief: Not the time to lose one’s head.
Arbie: No.
Master Chief: That’s not the way to get ahead in life.
Arbie: No.
Master Chief: It’s a shame he wasn’t more headstrong.
Arbie: Hmm.
Master Chief: He’ll never be the head of a major corporation.
Arbie: Okay, that’ll do.
Master Chief: Okay.
Halo 3 and Doom 3: do not mix.
So that’s where baby brutes come from.
Dinner and a FPS.
Boarding a Warthog—Gone Horribly Wrong
This is how NOT to board a Warthog
Aliens: Making women drivers look good since 2525.
Halo Style Kool-Aid Man;
Brute: “O Yeah!!!”
Arbitor: I knew we should’ve switched to geico!
Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiillllllllmmmmmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!
“I knew the hog was acting weird after it woke up from that coma.”
… (Alien reference)
Brute: “Peek a boo!”
—–
“Brutes: Engine replacements since 2552.”
We are so sued…
“Brutes will be a Brutes.”
“Damn it, Arby… You should have bought that squirrel.” (Rat Race reference)
Chief : Shit,police ahead…Did you hide the corpse?
Arbiter: They will never suspect..
Arbie: Not again…
I hope it doesn’t matter if I made my submission in “motivational poster” style.
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e248/MenaceBlake/Fuel-Rod.jpg
Brute: I knew I should’ve turned left in Albequerque!
I didnt know the arbiter was a woman
Most people like the new car smell, Arby decided on brute corpse.
1.Dammit chief, these biofuels suck!
2.the speed camera operator was soon admitted into special therapy.
3.recycled car parts are never as good as the new models.
1 …Well it’s no Hemi
2 “Custom Bodywork?” …damn, should’ve checked Carfax
3 Arbiter: This is not what I meant by “road head,” Chief
This time around, fuzzy dice just won’t do the trick. Now, with new Fuzzy Brute Head, you can actually feel the Fuzzies!
Also:
So that’s what happens when you do a SlipSpace jump where smoe other object is!
Arbitor: “Cursed schoolkids…cross on the green, not inbetween!”
Wow, warthogs are really powered by “brute” force.
“I know your poor but this is what you got?”
HEYYY YOUU GUYYYYSSS!!!
Should have gone to Free credit report dot com, i would have seen this coming at me like an atom bomb…
Oh, there Frankie is, we thought you were a goner
Your brute head is a little crooked. Let me straighten it for you.
Attempt No.
!.Chief: sorry Arbi, couldn’t find a warthog hood ornament anywhere.
2. Arbiter: this is not what i ment by pickin’ up chicks and gettin’ head!
3. Chief: this jeep sure can take a beating.
Arbiter: yeh it’s a BRUTE!
I hope this doesn’t void the warranty!
“You should see where the rest of him went!”
My other car has a Grunt head
“Remember, don’t get regular gas, look for genuine Unggoy® brand Grunt Methane!”
HOLY **** WE HIT MR.T !?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
I don’t know chief? I think that will take more than just a little water and soap to get that out. And i just had this detailed too.
i think you got scammed Arby, there’s no way this is a R.R. Phantom.
1.) M. Chief: “O__O AHHH!! ALIENS!!” Arbitor: “AND WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM!!”
2.) M. Cheif: “I’m Sorry Arbitor, but I’m going to have to give you an F for your driving exam. Hitting pedestrians is not a game, even if their a brute.
3.) Coming this Summer!! Master Chief In Master Chief and The Brute Skull!!
4.) M. Cheif: “I can’t die!! I can’t Die!! I CAN’T DIE I’m MASTER CHIEF FOR GOODNESS SAKES!!” Arbitor: “I learned this move playing Halo 3 when you went and had to escape the flood ship!!”
and the brute was one day from retirement……
1. “Lucy! You got some ‘splainin to dooo!
2. Arbiter: “Chief, don’t ever take your helmet off again.”
3. Remember kids: DON’T DRINK AND WALK.
That isn’t the gear shift Arby!!!! Let go of his balls, let him die peacefully.
Ah the old 2553 model. A Classic.
Coming this Summer …… A movie so intense it will shock you …….. so graphic it will make you laugh ……. so brutal you will beg for more …… Master Chief and the Arbiter in …….. 7h47 d4y w3 hun73d d4 brut3z
Beautiful day aint it??? HOLY -BLAM-
Brute:LOOKS LIKE YOU NEED GEICO INSURANCE GUYZ!!!
Arby and the Chief decided to make their own custom Hood Ornament that made them feel at home
That’s what you get when you buy the cheap GPS.
I think we just hit a little boy!!!
the spy division of brute tech was a success
The absolute worst windshield bug splatter in history!
Chief to arby: Hey, do you hear a ticking noise?
warthog; 3 million, brutes face of death; PRiCELESS
1: The self driving warthog! You can customize which head/computer will drive it for you!
2: NOOOO!!! GET TO THE CHOPPER!!!
After being rejected by its family, a mutated mole surfaces at a inconvenient time.
“Stop monkeying around.”
“Dude, it’s monkeying ABOUT!”
A bit of RvB reference…and I mean a bit…and slightly corny-ish…
Brute Mechanic: That’s the worst engine problem I have ever seen.
It turns out Brute bits get you 90 miles to the gallon!
Why continue to pay high prices for gasoline when you can switch to the new alternative fuel, Brute?
damn, there goes my no claims bonus…
Forget harmful fossil fuels and expensive ethanol! We bring you a new completely renewable fuel source: Brutes.
“Disclaimer: Renewability last so long as Brutes continue to reproduce, which I’m told is not a very pleasurable act.”
This was a bad time for Maintenance Brute to come out of that manhole.
Brute: OMGWTFBBQ!??!?!1one!!1!
We can’t stop here! This is brute country!
The ad-hoc engine impressed even Richard Dean Anderson.
“godammit Arby! look at what you’ve done to Ecto-1! I told Venkman that I’d bring it back in one piece. you’re making me look bad”
Out of nowhere a voice begins to sing…..
Brute: The hills are alive, with the sound of music!
Hey Kool-Aid!
The Master Chief and the Arbiter couldn’t scrape quite enough money together for a couple of airline tickets to Fiji, so they took the other option. And you all know what road-travel can be like today..
Yeah, They DROVE to Fiji.
These monster headlights now come standard with all latest model warthogs.
Dosiac?
This…
Is…
SHANGHEILOS!
—
FOR THE HORDE!
—
While the UNSC vehicles got white a re-skin for Avalanche, Bungie had something different in mind for the upcoming map pack ….
Let’s just hope the chaingun isn’t weak as hell.
When the Arbiter suggested their next day trip to Chester Zoo, the Chief KNEW that he’d regret it.
There was much fun on the day Bungie announced the new decap fatality achievement
Chief: See, I told you the engine sounded wierd…
“Oh god Cheif, I think we hit a kitten…”
Brute ” C4nz I hZa Recon?!?!?!?! plzz bungie I R’s 1337z.”
Arb ” Can you hear me now?!?!”
cheif(to arb)” I thought you had a bad dental plan…..and an ugly face….I hope this doesn’t stain”
Chief- LIKE ZOINKS, ARB!
“I Does Anything For Recons Sir”… MORE I’ll give u MORE!
Futuristic Flintstones.
Chief= Fred
Arby=Barney
Cortana=Wilma
N’tho ‘Sraom= Bam Bam
Brute in the warthog= Dino.
“Man, those Brutes must have one thick skull!”
“And this is why the Elites defected from the Covenant.”
“Arby realized too late that his new AI hood ornament’s personality was not very nice.”
“Hai!!! I r teh Monay fareyyy i have Grant3d u !,000,000,000,000 moni3s and INFinite girlFRINZZ
Arbiter: “He sure was desperate… We should have just given him the Reconz.”
—
Tagline Under Screen shot “Insurance. Don’t be skimpy with it, because not all of your neighbors are as nice as your insurance company is.”
—
Arbiter: “Uhhh Chief, I think YOU can go and get it out.”
*Chomping noise and MC screams*
Arbiter: “Oh, and watch out for those teeth. Guess they don’t make MJOLNIR armor like they used to.”
—
Chief: “OMGZ BRUTE ARMOR PERMZ! THAT IZ BETTER THAN RECONZ!
After the success of the original Warthog, and having an excess of Brute corpses at their disposal, the UNSC created the SPERMIE.
Space
Primate
Equipped
Raging
Manual
Infantry
Engine
That’s why our vehicles have roll bars…
MC-2 Arby “Are you going to put your seatbelt on now?”
“Peekaboo, I see you!”
Now that you have choosen you ordament we just need to weld it……hold still
Oh shi-
Is this a cryptic metaphor?
I Am Legend.
Starring: The Arbiter
AWW MAN 3 ONE TODAY…CMON.
and so on they killed 2 more brutes in that day a total of 5 brute’s killed… they should have baught the brute insurance.
brute: O MY GOD MY EYES THEY HURT GLASS IN THEM LEARN TO DRIVE!!!!!!
Arbiter: Did you hear somthing??
M.C: No did you??
Arbiter: ya
M.C: O well lets just move on.
MC: Oh man! that sack of oranges sure did put up a fight!
Arbiter: Umm…Cheif i think that was…
MC: It was a sack of oranges!!!!
Sorry if this was done before, but…
After a battle near Voi, the Arbiter noticed an unforeseen attachment to a UNSC Warthog, and immediately knew he would become rich once he would market the new “Jiralhanae Hood Orament: Screaming ’till the last”.
Remember kids, always buckle up. Or you’ll end up like this guy.
Once again, Jimmy the Head ruins a great picture.
Chief: Wow, and you said it was a cat under the hood, turns out it was a Frankie.
One wikid hood ornament.
hayguyswhatsgoingoninthisthread?
Seat Belts save lives
Gunman: AAAAHHHHH!!!!
Arbiter: Dude. He’s right there.
Gunman: AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!
1. oohhhhh geez… Chief, I found out what happened to that mechanic that disapeared at the shop.
2. Hey, we’re out of wiper fluid.
3. Ah God, why do these things always wanna to cross right at the last minute?!
……
There’s also a joke about the Geico Cavemen somewhere, but I’m too tired. Someone else can have it
artibir, i haz found zombees!
1. “Damn! Of course, this would happen just after I was finished cleaning the windscreen.”
2. “Oh my God! You hit him and… *sniff* Arbitor, have you been drinking? I knew it! I knew it! I should have stopped you. Friends don’t let friends drive drunk.”
Frankie returns back to bungie, finally showing his true colors…and intentions
“Brute-Brute, was that a left or a right turn to get to Mombassa?”
Arbiter: I just put in a new horn in this thing! Check it out!
*honks horn*
Brute: THAT DOESN’T BELONG THERE!
Nikko i told u to let him out at the last stop.
HOLY CRAP THERES A HEMI IN THAR!
Brute: Turn left here.
Chief: Quite an ingenius idea arbie.
Arbie: Yes, this is what we do on Sangheilia, we make our brute slaves be our gps, and if they get a turn wrong, we get into a “head on” collision.
We found Ling-Ling’s head!..Wait…
1. Chief to Arbiter- Don’t look, don’t talk, just keep driving.
2. Arby, no!, not the mother in law!
3. Chief to Arbiter- What on earth compelled you to drive through the ape enclosure?
4. During those brief few moments the chief realised he should have let the wife give little arby his driving lessons.
“Look at It this way, Chief, if this was Avalanche, He woulda slipped worse off the ice.”
“Yeah, but if it was Snowbound, he woulda Vetoed. Stick to driving Ghosts, Arby.”
“Y’Don’t have to be so harsh.”
“I have Brute Claw in my brain.”
“Well, I spilt my drink.”
“If you hadn’t been drinking, we wouldn’t of hit him.”
“Point Noted.”
Achievement Unlocked: Brute Skull – 20G
Brute heads.. my anti-drug.
Brute-nav, the must have for Arbiters everywhere
Brute:”Ahhh! I told you not to let go of the brake, now I have to do your brake-lines all over again!”
“Tony! Get me a crankshaft and spark plug, on the double!”
It’s a bird, it’s a plane, IT’S A 5.9L 1/2 TONNE V8 HEMI!!!
Oops…
TURN ON THE WHIPPERS ! !
Life comes at you fast…
“Life comes at you fast?”
Brute: Ahh! My hair!
New Armour Permutation gone wrong.
This guy’s the best, you said. He can fix anything, you said. Why the hell’s MacGuyver playing halo 3 anyway?
BruteBrute says… take exit 47 north to “The Ark.” Thank you for using BruteBrute from last minute ‘hog rentals, inc.
There can only be ONE highlander!!!
Chief: You weren’t kidding Arby, this new turbo really SCREAMS!
Arby cheats at Conker.
“The downfall of the brute pack mentality: the uncertainty of the definition of the word ‘pack’, and weren’t brutes supposed to be smarter in Halo 3?”
The Locust was totally unprepared for what happened next. (Gears of War)
_______________
I’M SPARTACUS!
_______________
WAAAZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZUUUUUUPPP.
_______________
o wtf how i get here i suk wit halo 3
Hold RB to – wait what? how did you do that?
Right after a splatter a Brute head pops up through the windshield and says: “Toasty!!”.
The hidden brute just had to blow his cover when the arbiter missed the accelerator.
1.Following the ‘incident’ the warthog turrets were changed so they fired just that little bit lower.
2. The hidden brute just had to blow his cover when the arbiter missed the accelerator pedal.
3. Well it was a good kill and warthogs don’t have trunks…..
Brute=Noob asking for Recon.
Arbiter and associates= Bungie and their warthog denial that casts you to the deepest pits of th NO Recon list, hence their usual answer to this question.
Mindfuck-When you see it, you’ll shit brix
Arby: There’s something strange about this..
MC : Yeah,looks like the Fuel Rod is shooting bullets!
Arby : *Facepalm*
You’d think that if a Warthog could give birth, it’d give birth to a pig, right?
Brute: I swear, officer, I’m sober!!!!
Officer: Lemme see your liscense.
Brute: Ok, I left it under the hood. It’s in the m- WHAT THE FUCK! This ain’t my car!!!
Officer: You’re under arrest!
Brute: AAAAARRRRRGGGGG!!!!!
“How many times do I have to tell you Arby, putting the head of a brute on the the hog will not scare away other brutes!”
1.Well, this is awkward…
2. Funniest thing, so I’m driving around, and whadda ya know? I get a splatter.
3.How YOU doing?
“So, come here often?”
“Why does it always come down to this?”
-SR
Is that a hemi?
McGyver used a paper clip, an eraser, and an elastic band. And Master Chief? He rolls more ‘severed-alien-head’ style.
damn pedestrians!
O HAI!
Allstate: Are you in good hands?
Oh my God! It’s like that Alien movie! Only, it’s a car, not a person! And it’s not an Alien, it’s a Brute. And we’re driving the person/car… and we’re shooting the gun…
Okay, that was a really bad compatrison. So sue me.
See, I told you the knocking wasn’t because I forgot to change the oil!
Oh my god Arby there’s a spider on the windshield! GETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFF!
“Surprise Kevin! Wait…your not Kevin?!”
“Omg! They’re gunna burn my Fo-Hawk!”
*Notice turret above his head looks like a flamethrower.*
*Brute Pops Out* “I JUST SAVED A BUNCH OF MONEY ON CAR INSURANCE BY SWITCHING TO GEICO!”
1. GRAND THEFT ARBITER
2. Ok, I’m a little drunk.
3. CAN I HAZ RECON?
4. “…POP goes the weasel!”
DAmmit! i told you to put the brute stripper cake in the back!
Brute: Are we there yet?
–
Arbiter: And whenever I go above twenty it starts making this weird howling noise…
–
Master Chief opens the trunk for the first time in 3 months and exclaims
” OH MY GOD, FLUFFY! “
Warthog: $50,000
Mjolnir Mark VI power armour: $210,000,000
Alien Holy warrior: $50 an hour
Having an angry rhino-gorilla-alien burst out of your car in time to freak out your new expensive friend and break you car: Priceless
“Well He’ll never get aHEAD in Life!”
“The New Brutehog, Be aHEAD of the competition!”
Wassup?
I’m a firin’ ma laser!
The look on the red guys face from last week’s lovin’.
“Oh hey, Hi. I’m Digger. Don’t mind me, I’m just a Dermatofiet, ya know, a nail infection.”
Shishka on a good day.
“And you said mosquitos were bigger in Texas!”
MCheif manslaughtered BruteHamChf +$100
Oh Hai! You have any Headlight fluid I can haz?
now that just looks brute-al
When Bungies modelling budget is not enough.
Please tell me you have Brute insurance.
“This is why the Arbiter is never allowed to drive.”
Hood ornaments and bobble heads, a bizzare combination.
Hood ornaments. You’re doing it wrong.
Arbiter to Chief: Well Chief I think we found the mechanic. And whats this? Chief what’s up with this Brute Head?
Chief: Sweet Sweet Necrophelyiac
Arbiter: Hey man. Check this sh!t out. It’s like Nitrous. With hydraulics.
Chief: Yeah? You should see my SnowHog. I got something better than yours.
*Chief holds a pic up*
Chief: can you see that?
Arbiter: No.
*chief holds close-up of SnowHog*
Chief: Read.
The title reads: *The new Hood blower 2000! Garonteed to give you 400 extra horsepower!*
Arbiter: So what? Mine looks kickass.
Arbiter: “I swear Drunk I’m not Officer!!!”
SHOOP DA WHOOP!
“I pity the fool who runsover Mr. T.”
“Arby:Ok thats one down two to go.
M.C.:The A-Team has 4 members.
Arby:$h!7!”
“Ok, last time I play co-op with my wife!”
Brute to Arbiter & Chief: “Why can’t we just be FRIENDS?!” *sob*
Chief: “Geico is never gonna believe this…”
Arbiter: “I wonder what’s been making that funny noise when I start the engine?”
Chief: “I dunno. Nice bobble head.”
Arbiter: “What Bobble Head?”
Brute: “Oooohhhhhhhh…”
Arbiter: “Chief, tell me you didn’t go to another rave with the grunts.”
Chief: “…”
“50G – achievement unlocked: ugly mofo stankbreath hood ornament acquired”
Arby: Hey chief, you wouldn’t happen to be carrying a tic-tac rifle would you?
Chief: Hey Arby…
Arby: What up?
Chief: We’ve got a newb on the turret, let’s mess with him.
Arby: Cool
Chief: Hey turret-guy! There’s a brute trying to carjack us! Shoot him before he melee’s me to death!
Turret-guy: The turret won’t aim that low! What do I do?!?!
Arby: We’re toast… jump on three… one… two…
Turret-guy… aaaaahhhhh (muffled thud)
Chief: haaaaaaaa…. stupid newb.
Chief: Holy crap Arby, what did you hit?!
Arby: Cockroach.
Chief: There’s no way that’s a cockroach!
Arby: You’ve never been to Florida before, have you?
1) Arby: “This sure puts a hole in my plans for today…”
2)
Arby: “Blarg!”
Brute: “Roar!”
Arby: “Blarg!”
Brute”Roar!”
Arby: “BLARG!”
Brute: “ROAR!”
Arby: “Ok this is clearly not working. Let’s just talk in English.”
Brute: “Good idea.”
Brute:Peak a boo
Arby: Ewwww, gross! I just hit a jaywalking brute and his head is stuck to the hood! His face still looks all mad at me.
Chief: Dude, I can’t see his face from this angle.
Arby: Take the wheel… let me turn his head so you can see him. Do we have any of those french fries from Thursday still on the floorboard?
Chief: Yeah, but they’re a bit stale.
Arby: Sweet; I’ll hold your fuel-rod cannon… see if you can fit like fifty of them in his mouth… oohh! ooohh! ooohh! and give him a ketchup moustache!
Chief: Yeah, and I’ll try to put one in each nostril and each ear.
Arby: Just save me the crunchy ones… I like the crunchy ones.
Because a grunt in your Warthog just isn’t as much fun.
I ordered a double cheese burger, not a brute. Brutes are not welcome here.
John seems somewhat unhappy with the hood ornament of his new Mercedes Brute.
Arbiter: Where i came from this is how we say hello.
MC: What?
Arbiter: I sai-
MC: I heard what you said.
Arbiter:Anyways the game ended when som…”Bam”……wtf was that?
MC: Hit and run. keep driving they’ll find out your an illegal.
Arby: “I’m sure glad Bungie let us borrow Shishka for this!!”
Chief: “I thought he was going to help us with our Foundry map…”
Arby: “Remember? He deleted my double box, so this is his punishment.”
I hate mondays…
20 Points!
This is what we do to people that give us poor directions. Tell your friends.
MC: Whoa.
Arbiter: He H-he j-just jumped right out.
MC: I bet at 30 mph this could have been avoided
Arbiter: I bet at 30 mph i would have been asleep.
Chief: Ya know your right. He does look like the dad from that American Chopper show.
Arby: Uh-oh……better get Maaco
MC: “God Dangit Arby, Do ya know how much it costs to fill up this thing, this is an 8v gas-guzzler. Were goanna have to hop to a new one man! I just thought i’d kick 2 marines out of this thing just so I could fill up the tank, and YOU could blow it all!!!”
Arby: “Ooops…Sorry man, I won’t text next time.”
Cheif “hey you like the new warthog they put in”
Arbiter “no but i like the new hood ordiment”
No, dammit! I said I wanted a Baby Jesus on the dashboard!
“et tu brute “
Chief – Is that blood ?
Arbiter – Erm, No, did you get the Collision Damage Waiver option when we rented this hog?
Chief – No, it was a bloody rip off. Why ?
Arbiter – Er, nothing, quick look up there its a banshee…………..
The Arbiter realized that in their off-time, the brutes were paying far too much time online watching the ‘Raving Rabbids’ videos for laughs, and were starting to “DAAAAA!!!!” themselves to death.
Leave the chopper at home they said. Walking never hurt anyone they said.
1) With the addition of 4 player coop, Bungie tried several unsuccessful versions of the later scrapped 4 seater Puma Assault Vehicle.
2) “Et Tu Brute?”
3) Shotgun, you’re doing it wrong.
What did I tell you about spawning a teleporter under the hood, Chief?
OK, I looked through previous weeks, and saw the first one… I couldn’t resist.
After Nintendo dropped Halo 3 for Wii, Bungie almost forgot to scrap the fairy.
Yes, I realize it’s ridiculously late.
Gigaty Gigaty BOO!
Yo cheif check out my new hood decal, it be bitchin
Malcolm Reynolds: Well, I see the doc and Zoe got the bodies on here and Wash put some holes in the Hog, but did you get the red paint Kaylee? How are we going to get by the Reavers in this? They are going to eat us alive. All we needed was a some red paint. How hard was it?
Malcolm: Faster, faster, faster would be better.
Jayne: We already killed him.
Malcolm: What was that?
Jayne: Sure we be nice if we had some grenades don’t ya’ think?
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: You think she’ll hold together?
Zoë: She’s torn up plenty, but she’ll fly true.
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Could be bumpy.
Zoë: Always is
No matter how hard they tried, Arby ‘n’ the Chief just couldn’t stop the Brute from trying to sing.
Cheif: “mah roflbrute goes arg arg argargarg argagrgagrga!!!11!1one!!11!”
Cheif: Hey Arby, we’re concerned about you. I know that you’re happy you killed Tartarus, but you have to let it go. The head, I mean. It’s starting to smell.
“Tis Just a Minor Flesh Wound.. Come Back ‘ere and I’ll Gnaw Your Leg Off!!”
Jesus, we just hit that Brute pretty hard. Think we should stop to see if he’s ok?
PEEKABOO
Innovative as always, the Arbiter and Chief adding a whole new meaning to the term “Heads Up”.
This is why Brutes never attempt a stealthy ambush.
This Brutes attempt at feigning death has gone horribly wrong…
CHIEF: hey arbiter, i told you go to a real mechanic, but noooooo you had to do the job yourself!!!!
ARBITER: hey the guy in the back said that it looked like an air intake, you know, like a muscle car?
CHIEF: A mouth is not an intake……..
ARBITER :this is great chief !!!!!! you hid a fake brute head under the hood to scare the gunnar!!!!!!! classic.
CHIEF: did you just hear a big thud? and what happened to that guy in the middle of the road?
Brute: HEYYYYYYY GUYS!!!!!!!
Master Cheif and Arbiter: “WHAT THE HELL!?!?!?”
MC: So what d’you like to do on a sunday?
Arbiter: You know, chill out re-waitaminute, you see the head right?
MC: Yeeeah, we’re ignoring that.
Vrrrrroooooooooooooom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!eeeeeeekscreeech!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Advertisement- yeah…. he’s thinkin Arbys, well either that or he’s just dead
In a warthog with the Arbiter and Chief. This Brute is obviously the envy of his friends.
“The Arbiter thought Lord Hood had overcome his grudge against the Elites when he commissioned him his very own Warthog. That was, until he saw it.”
“The Arbiter in the Chief’s hand-me-down Warthog..”
“Much to the detriment of his Warthog, the Arbiter had his armor pimped instead.”
“The Arbiter, never listening to his mother’s warnings about Brutes wandering the streets at night, experienced the inevitable.”
“The weird part? He was driving in reverse..”
“Poor com signal resulted in the Arbiter’s faithful efforts to bring Lord Hood “the Brute’s head on a splatter”.
278 responses? Are you seriously going to read all these? Man.. :feels bad:
Of course I will. I always do. :)
I was informed that there was to be a free lunch buffet!
LAWSUIT!
This brute insists that it is HIS warthog the arbiter is driving.
Two weeks later, teleporting restrictions were introduced.
Brute: Gurlumph, nortulpha margrumph?
Arbiter: No, this isn’t High Charity.
Owned. Now finally i have Bungie power, where will this Brute spawn next?
“AFLAC!”
Hey Mr. Brute? how many licks to the center of the warthog?
Are those claams? I love claams.
that little lizard sure gets angry when u dont choose geico
Arby”Is the virus Airborne? Tell me it didn’t!”
Cheif: “Give it a week, mabye two and I can reverse the damage”
Arby: “Cheif, you said you’re going, not we’re going… What do you mean, you’re going?”
Chief “I can still fix this! This is my site, this is ground zero”
Arby: “This isn’t up to you… this is out of…”
euurrggghhhh SMASH
(I am legend)