Don’t Say These Things in Another Country

I stumbled upon an entertaining site called BlahblahFish which translates your phrases from English to another language and then back again to see “what’s lost (or gained) in translation”. It’s silly mindless fun so I thought it would interesting to see what my Top 10 Halo Pick-Up Lines were like in foreign languages. I warned you last time that you probably can’t score using these lines in English, and now I know you apparently can’t score using them in these other languages as well. I guess it’s back to the ol’ drawing board.

Original : I think something is wrong with my auto-aim. I can’t take my eyes off you.
Serbian : JA misliti nešto 3. lice od TO BE u prezentu nepravda s moj auto – namjera. JA can’t uzeti moj oèi undress te.
Retranslated : I believe some with it be from present iniquity with my car undertaking I can’t receive my eyes undress you.
Conclusion : We all know guys mentally undress females with their eyes on a frequent basis but apparently Serbians actually fess up to it. And blame it on their cars. Brilliant really.

halo 3 screenshotOriginal : Do you need a Magnum because I’ve got one right here for you. In my pants.
Greek : Χρειάζεστε μια φιάλη δύο λίτρων επειδή έχω ένα δικαίωμα εδώ για σας. Στα εσώρουχά μου.
Retranslated : Need a bottle of two litres because I have a right here for you. In my underwears.
Conclusion : Two liters? Holy shit. I would guess people in Greece spit a whole lot more than they swallow. That or they guzzle large amounts of water from ingesting all that salt. Eek.

Original : As soon as I came near you, the announcer said “unfreakinbelievable” and I would tend to agree.
Czech : Jakmile JÁ came blízký tebe , èlen urèitý hlasatel øekl “unfreakinbelievable” a JÁ chtìl bych dávat pozor až k souhlasit.
Retranslated : Soon as self came neared you , the herald said “unfreakinbelievable” plus self would attempt to overthrow the government to assent.
Conclusion : There are people who will do anything for you, and there are people who will do anything for you. I’m pretty sure someone who says they are willing to overthrow their government should be avoided at all costs. Unless you hate your government of course.

halo 3 screenshotOriginal : Are we playing Assault? Cause I’m pretty sure you are the bomb.
Icelandic : Ert við leika Árás? Orsök I’m laglegur viss þú ert the sprengja.
Retranslated : Art accustom play Attack? Cause I’m good-looking sure you art the explode.
Conclusion : Someone so good looking that you will “explode” by simply looking at them? I’ll take ten please. Every day for the rest of my life.

Original : With the weapons I just need to hit “X” to pick them up. Does that work for you as well?
Norwegian : Med det våpen JEG rettferdig nød å finne “X” å hakke seg opp. Does det arbeide for du likeledes?
Retranslated : With the arms I a fair way destitution to hit “X” to chop her up. Does facts work for you also?
Conclusion : Did the conversation just switch from hitting on somebody to discussing various ways of disposing of dead bodies? Talk about a buzz kill. Get it? Buzz kill? Never mind.

halo 3 screenshotOriginal : You are impressed with how I handle my sniper? You should see what I can do with the weapon I pack under my armor.
Serbian : Te biti impresioniran s kako JA ruèka moj rezuckanje? Te treba vidjeti šta JA moæi èiniti s odreðeni èlan oružje JA omot ispod moj štit.
Retranslated : You subsist impressed with how I crank my snip? You is required lift up the eyes I can act with the arm I bale below my armor.
Conclusion : I do believe I have just discovered the best phrase ever to describe the act of masturbating. “Yes, I will excuse you while you go crank your snip.” “Did you say something? Sorry, I was cranking my snip.” “Why aren’t you paying attention? Are you too busy cranking your snip?” Man, that is never going to get old.

Original : *eyeing the breast plate* I am a master dual wielder. Mind if I give those a go?
German : * die Brustplatte eyeing * ich bin ein Vorlagendoppelwielder. Kümmern Sie sich, um wenn ich denen gehen gebe?
Retranslated : * the brustplatte eyeing * I is a Vorlagendoppelwielder. Do you worry, over if I to those go give?
Conclusion : There is nothing I love more than vorlagendoppelwielding. Besides actually saying vorlagendoppelwielding.

halo 3 screenshotOriginal : I’m like a plasma grenade. Let me get on you and you are guaranteed to explode.
Portuguese : Eu sou como um grenade do plasma. Deixe-me começar em você e você é garantido para explodir.
Retranslated : I am I eat one grenade of the plasma. He leaves me to start in you and you he is guaranteed to blow up.
Conclusion : I have never eaten a grenade before but apparently you will blow up if you do that. Who knew?

Original : I was following the indicator of where to score and it brought me to you.
Slovenian : sem bil sledeè kazalec od kam zareza ter to brought mi vam na uslugo.
Retranslated : I was following trigger finger with whither wound and this brought we to you.
Conclusion : If somebody ever wounded my sacred trigger finger, you bet I would hunt them down. Hunt them down and kill them. Don’t mess with my crucial video game digits, I’m not kidding.

halo 3 screenshotOriginal : I would like to gain access to your base. Shall I enter from the front or the rear?
Turkish : I -cekti beðenmek -e doðru kazanç giriþ -e doðru senin temel. -ecek I girmek –dan belgili tanýmlýk ön ya da belgili tanýmlýk yetiþtirmek?
Retranslated : I like had straight gain entry had straight thine foundation. I enter dan the face or even if the cause to reach?
Conclusion : Someone who doesn’t mind the stretch of reaching the rear just in case you don’t want your face entered? What a find. I am so moving to Turkey.

16 Responses to Don’t Say These Things in Another Country

  1. Ragingterror says:

    I was playing Lost Odyssey until a few minutes ago… now I think I’ll just go crank my snip.

    Hahahahahaha… :D

  2. Ragingterror says:

    “Do you need a Magnum because I’ve got one right here for you. In my pants.”

    English –> Icelandic –> English

    “Do you want a Magnum accordingly I’ve litter single right here pay lip service to you. INTO my underpants household.”

    Lip service? Sounds pretty X-rated to me… :P

  3. soulofaqua says:

    Oh these are F@#ing awesome! as is this one from my native language:

    English first: I’ve noticed something about the Halo 3 heat maps. The hottest area is always where you are standing.

    Dutch: Ik heb iets over Halo 3 hittekaarten opgemerkt. Het heetste gebied is altijd waar u zich bevindt.

    English after: I something has noticed 3 heat cards concerning halo. The hottest area is always where you are yourself…..

  4. Mar says:

    Yay Turkey!

  5. -S- says:

    “I would guess people in Greece spit a whole lot more than they swallow.”

    Hey, HEY! Don’t think I didn’t see that, Angel *raises eyebrow*

  6. Pundarquartis says:

    Heh… I know both serbian and norweigan and I can tell you that the serbian translations was completely horrible, but the norweigan was actually readable.

  7. Socket29 says:

    AAAH! The German translation is so messed up! I’m fluent in it so it sounds really weird.

  8. Crazyeye0 says:

    I died of laughter XD

  9. Oh how I needed that laugh…right out loud! That was great!

  10. Lovemuffin says:

    ROFL LMAO, these are so funny!

    Please do more!

  11. Kim says:

    With the weapons I just need to hit “X” to pick them up. Does that work for you as well?

    Med dette våpenet trenger jeg bare å trykke “X” for å plukke den opp. Virker dette også for deg?

    This is what it should have been.

  12. DragonKnight08 says:

    Wow…I was lauging all the way through!
    English:Why are you running that way when my base is here?

    Retranslated fro Japanese:When my basis is here, why is the method being moved?

  13. Inqvisitor says:

    Original : I’m like a plasma grenade. Let me get on you and you are guaranteed to explode.
    Portuguese : Eu sou como uma granada de plasma. Deixa-me atirar-me a ti e garanto-te que explodes.
    Retranslated : I’m like a plasma grenade. Let me trow myself at you and i guarantee you’ll explode.

    como can be eat or how/like so that portuguese is fairly normal if use a web translator which if yes i understand the joke xD
    it was a nice read thought.

  14. Ultra Dolphin says:

    Wow, I’m Serbian and those were the most hilarious translations I have ever seen. Where do you find this stuff?

  15. TR1NITY says:

    I love vorlagendoppelwielding too.

  16. Jodie says:

    Online translators, always good for a laugh…. I tried a line from Fallout:

    “War. War never changes.”

    Should be quite simple.


    “warfare Warfare never alterations.”


    “War. The war does not change never.”


    “War. War does not change under any condition.”

    (This translation’s pretty good but it doesn’t sound anywhere near as effective)

    And my personal favourite, Czech:

    “war War never stock exchange.”

    Hopefully, a professional translation company is used when translating game scripts….

    On a slightly unrelated note, my partner was so pleased with himself for picking up some Italian from Assassin’s Creed. He reckons he’s going to use it if we ever go to Italy but if he does, I’m going to put as much space between me and him as possible. I’m guessing they’d’ve taken the period into account, so it’d be like him talking like a Shakespeare character over here.

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